


Saved

by AJsRandom



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dragons, F/M, Humor, Magic, Romance, mergana - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-23
Updated: 2016-08-23
Packaged: 2018-08-10 11:21:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 31,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7842955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJsRandom/pseuds/AJsRandom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neither Morgana nor Aithusa knew the full effects of Aithusa’s healing spell. And, given another chance, will Morgana choose good over evil? Arwen and eventual Mergana.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A huge thanks goes to my beta, Moonfox, for her expert thrashing of my draft. Another massive thanks goes to my artist, Valika56, who not only created a cover, but a fantastic fanmix and several other pieces of art to accompany my story. And last but not least, to the mods at After Camlann- thanks for the opportunity to participate in this fun fest!
> 
> Go see the artwork! [Art at AO3](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7839322)

The woman, dressed in black, stumbled through the forest. She reeled from pain all over her body, particularly from her abdomen. She pressed her hand there, not quite staunching the flow of blood. And she had no way to heal it; her scant magic was used up when she’d transported herself outside the citadel. It rose up behind her, as if mocking her failed achievement. She set her face away from it and kept up her slow trudge through the trees.

The thoughts running through her mind kept her going. How had they done this? They had nearly no one; I had a strong army. How had he taken her magic? When? Why did he help someone who would just as soon kill him? Why do I never win for long? Why? Who had caused the ceiling to come down on her? No one had been there!

All too soon her thoughts were overwhelmed by the pain. The pain finally overrode her mind and she collapsed to her knees then to her side. She lay there, knowing she breathed her last few breaths. She’d never be queen. She’d never have her revenge. All her great power had come to naught. When had her life become so . . .

Her eyes closed. The haze of pain caused her not to hear a curious flutter of wings and the landing of clawed feet. She didn’t hear the little creature’s squeak of curiosity or hear its wings flutter again. The small dragon flew again briefly it sat down closer to the woman. He tilted his head as his senses told him what his eyes didn’t—this was a fellow creature of magic and she was dying.

Instinct prompted him to aid her. With that in mind, he opened his tiny mouth to breathe healing instead of flames.

The woman felt _energy_ flowing. Something was happening to her. Images appeared in her mind—warmth and comforting darkness. A magical voice, bringing courage and strength to break through that darkness, to see what was out there. Laughing from two sources, two powerful beings of magic stared down at her. One, big, old and wise—Kilgharrah, mentor, friend. The other, smaller, but strong—master, father, lord. Blue eyes set in a face she knew looked down at her. Oh, she knew _him_ all right. But _how? Why? When?_

When the little dragon felt that she’d healed enough to survive, he closed his mouth. He watched as the woman opened her eyes that fixed on him in wonder. _Life, good_ , he thought, and prepared to take off again. She interested him enough that he’d find her later, to make sure of her recovery. He sensed something in her, something good that he could perhaps encourage. He’d left her with enough to think about; things that could change her path in life if she would simply let them.

Aithusa took off, spiraling upward, out over the trees and back to his mentor. He wouldn’t tell Kilgharrah or his lord about the woman. _Something_ told him to keep what he’d done for her a secret, until the time was right. It would be hard, but it would be worth it. That same feeling also told him that it wouldn't be for long.

**xxxXxxx**

Morgana laid there and watched the little white dragon fly away _._ Dragon? Weren’t they supposed to be extinct? The tiny creature had done something to her. Something that had caused her to feel warmth and see . . . things. Were those the little dragon’s memories? She’d been looking up at the other dragon and _him_. She shook her head; she didn’t want to think about _him_ right now.

The witch rolled onto her back to assess her wounds. Her side—she pressed her hand to her right side and pulled it away; there was no blood. She pressed her hand back to her side and gently prodded at the spot, only to feel no pain. Twisting her neck a bit, she looked down to the tear in her dress. She widened it a bit and saw only the thinnest scar she’d ever seen. It looked like she had been healed for _months_.

She slowly flexed the muscles of her arms, back, abdomen, and legs. Nothing hurt. Then she sat up to visually inspect her arms and legs, which had been thoroughly bruised from her collision with the wall. And the chunks of ceiling. No bruises marked her limbs now.

The little white dragon had healed her every wound, and had left her with its memories. Why? Did it not know who she was? What she stood for? She wished the little dragon would come back so she could thank it. She owed the creature her life.

Now to decide where to go. She couldn’t go back to her hovel, not to live anyway. _He_ knew where it was. And _Emrys_ knew where it was. Fine. She’d go back to collect supplies and then destroy it. Maybe Morgause’s small, hidden castle was empty still . . . Okay. It was time to get going. To start all over again from nothing. How many times could she do this? And would she repeat this cycle for the rest of her life? Plot, plan, gather allies, build an army, invade, attack, oust, rule, be counterattacked, watch her allies die, get driven out, and end up with nothing.

“ _WHAT?!_ ” Where had _that_ thought come from?

Talking to herself was getting her nowhere, so she picked herself up and started walking. To keep herself from thinking, she recited stories Morgause had told her. Stories about magic’s origin, early practitioners, magical creatures and more. Before she knew it, she was at her hovel.

Morgana went inside and started gathering all the food she had. She put this into a bag and started scanning her shelves of supplies. Very few of these would travel well. She rolled her blankets into a bedroll, she scanned the room for anything else she might need. After adding a pot and a wooden spoon to her bag, she looked around the room again, trying to find any fond memories of it. Nothing. No happy bits of nostalgia.

She stomped outside and up the small hill that looked down onto the hovel. She would not miss this place. She held up her hand and said, “ _Tófiel!_ ” The hovel collapsed in on itself, crushing everything inside. Nature would reclaim it in time.

Satisfied, she turned her back on the demolished hovel and walked away.

**xxxXxxx**

Merlin yawned. This had to be the longest council meeting in the history of council meetings. And he’d gotten little sleep the night before,. He should be helping to right the citadel and damage to the Lower Town, using his talent when he could. But no, the King of All Prats had insisted he be here so he could offer insight into the day’s events and fetch things. He rubbed his face for the twentieth time and sighed. It wouldn’t be so bad if he got to sit at the round table. He could sleep with his eyes open while sitting.

Arthur was understandably excited. Gwen was his fiancée again, and he wanted to get to the part of the meeting where he could tell everyone about it. Then, they could plan their immediate wedding and her coronation. Considering what had happened last time, they wanted to do it as soon as was reasonably possible. But the welfare of the rest of the people was more important than his personal life, and Gwen, being who she was, agreed.

Various knights had given their reports. Gwaine and Elyan had gone first; they wanted to get Gaius helped as soon as possible. The old physician wasn’t here now because he’d been taken to his chambers and made comfortable. A couple of the servants who’d assisted him from time to time were there with him, seeing to his needs and to others who needed help.

_That’s another place I should be_ , Merlin thought.

Amazingly enough, the castle’s infrastructure wasn’t damaged much. Helios had been a firm leader who’d kept a tight leash on his men. Pillaging and plundering had been mostly confined to the lower town. The vaults hadn’t even been broken into. Apparently they’d thought there would be enough time to enjoy the treasure later.

The Lower Town would be recovering for some time. Many merchants had had their goods, their livelihoods, ripped away from them. When they resisted, things were destroyed. Many women had been . . . violated. And if they protested, they were severely beaten. Out of everything, that atrocity angered the King and Merlin the most. If most hadn’t already been dead or dying right now, he’d probably have found a way to make the mercenaries suffer a bit more for that. Reparations for those atrocities were being calculated now, even though they’d never make up for what those women had lost.

Merlin let his mind wander away again. Back to an old ache—Morgana. What had happened to her? She had been fighting Gwen, and the future queen had been losing. Then he’d crept up behind her and had dropped the ceiling without a word. She’d flown back so hard that part of the ceiling had collapsed on her. But when he’d stepped forward to capture her, she was gone. Had she gotten enough magic back to transport away? Where did she go? And was she still alive? It looked like she’d already been hurt—she’d been clutching her side. But how?

He tried to shake these questions out of his mind, only to have them replaced by the oddest urge. Suddenly he wanted to slink out of there and go _find_ Morgana. But that was stupid. If she was dying then he should just let her die. Everyone in Camelot would agree and greatly benefit from her death. He could just go _confirm_ she’s dead—wait, why? That was stupid too. If she wasn’t, she’d just try to kill him. And if she was, what would he do? Besides, she couldn’t go far in her current condition, and she didn’t have enough magic to heal herself. They could always ride out in the morning. Plenty of time to find her, if they felt so inclined. Which Arthur probably wasn’t. He’d get through this tedious talk and his head would be in the clouds after that. Terrific.

Suddenly, the use of his name drew him out of his introspection. “Merlin! You idiot! I’ve said your name three times now! Get over here!” the King’s voice called out. Mentally rolling his eyes, the servant in question walked slowly over to his master, to cater to his newest whim.

**xxxXxxx**

Morgana walked until nightfall, then found a small cave to shelter her for the night. She made a small fire and brought out some of her food and her bedroll. She’d be warm enough here. Morgause’s small castle was less than a day’s walk from here. It was hidden so well that she’d be untraceable and could be hidden for as long as she chose.

After she’d eaten a bit of her dried food, she laid out her bedroll and crawled under her blankets. She just wanted to forget her very long day. She checked to make sure her bracelet was on her arm then rolled over and closed her eyes.

It wasn’t long before she’d descended into the dream phase of sleep. Only instead of prophetic dreams or her nightmares of Emrys, she dreamed the little dragon’s memories. They were hazy around the edges, but clear enough to see and hear everything going on around her.

_When the big, wise dragon, Kilgharrah spoke, she turned her head toward his voice. “A white dragon is, indeed, a rare thing . . . and fitting. For in the dragon tongue, you named him after the light of the sun. No dragon birth is without meaning.”  The little dragon,_ Aithusa _, she remembered, cooed and kept pecking away at his shell until all of it had fallen to the grass. Kilgharrah continued, “Sometimes the meaning is hard to see, but this time I believe it is clear. The white dragon bodes well for Albion, for you and Arthur, and for the land that you will build together.”_

_He hadn’t been speaking to Aithusa; he’d been speaking to_ him _, to_ Merlin _. But she couldn’t summon her hatred, her sense of betrayal while in Aithusa’s memories. The little dragon preened and flared his wings before taking off on a short flight to his . . . Dragon Lord? Yes, Merlin was his Dragonlord. He’d hatched Aithusa, who was now on his shoulder. He wiped the tears off his face and laughed, then opened his arms for Aithusa to jump into. “My little Aithusa,” he said and cuddled the little dragon close to his chest._

_She could feel the attachment Aithusa had to his Lord. Warm feelings of protectiveness, hope, peace, and . . . love. And she felt those emotions radiated right back from Merlin. The feelings were_ amazing _. She could also smell everything surrounding Aithusa.  Leather, herbs, clean linen, fresh grass, and the clear night air. It left her feeling utter contentment, like she could stay in this moment forever._

_Kilgharrah’s voice broke in, “Come, little one. We must go.  Our Dragonlord needs his rest.”_

_Aithusa cooed in disappointment, but turned in Merlin’s arms, preparing for flight._

_“Do not worry, little one. We shall see Merlin again soon.”_

_Aithusa felt them communicate silently._

_“Goodbye, Aithusa,” he said. “Be well, and listen to Kilgharrah.”_

_Aithusa cooed again and took off into the air, feeling joy at being able to use his wings freely. He waited for the bigger dragon to launch himself into the air, then followed him into the night._

Morgana woke with a start. The little dragon’s memories had come to her again. But she’d been healed many hours ago—shouldn’t the effect have worn off by now? Even more disturbing, she had been feeling warm feelings about _Merlin_?! Of all people, why did _he_ have to have a connection to her little white savior?

But at least a few things made sense now. The dragon that had burned the men she’d sent after Arthur, _Merlin_ must have commanded it to do that. He’s a dragonlord. Great. That was just one more thing he had over her. As if poisoning her, driving her from Camelot twice and hurting Morgause weren’t bad enough . . . but, the way he’d cared for newborn Aithusa . . . NO! She still despised him, didn’t she?

Frustrated, she rolled back into her blanket and lay down to sleep again. No cute and cuddly dream about her nemesis would make her feel any differently about him. Ever. She gladly settled back into sleep’s peaceful arms.

**xxxXxxx**

In the morning, Morgana woke feeling greatly refreshed. She’d had no more dreams or memory flashes or whatever those images from the little dragon were. After she’d stretched a bit and ate, she packed up her things and started walking again. There was still no pain from yesterday’s injuries, and she thanked her goddess for that.

She walked most of the day, stopping to rest and eat as she needed to. In the late afternoon she finally reached the little lake and waterfall that hid Morgause’s castle from the world. She reached for her magic and found it there, still somewhat diminished from whatever Emrys had done to her. But it was sufficient to help her across the lake. “ _Stánas forestæppunga, áríseaþ_!” she called.

A low rumbling sound, followed by a bubbling, started in the lake. Circular stones rose up out of the water, making a path across the lake to the waterfall. Morgana moved forward, crossing the lake. When she reached the waterfall, she yelled, “ _Sencaþ!_ ” and watched the stones submerge themselves.

Turning, she walked through the waterfall and the small tunnel behind it. A few more steps and she would see it: Morgause’s castle. Or hers now, actually. After Morgause had rescued her from Camelot, they’d stayed here off and on. It may be worse for wear with the tumbledown walls, but it was as close to a home as she had these days.

Her heart swelled as she walked up to the entrance and inside. She walked throughout the castle, noting its condition. Some repairs were needed, and a bit of cleaning. A few spells would take care of that. She sat her pack down in the main bedroom then cast a spell for cleaning. Calling it good, at least for the night, she sat down at the lone table and ate some of her remaining food. Tomorrow she’d check the vegetable garden and acquire some meat. It was time to rest again.

**xxxXxxx**

Merlin fought back the rolling of his eyes for about the tenth time that day. He’d been ordered to be the go-between of the affianced couple and the staff putting together the wedding. Due to the headache this was giving him, he decided that this service would be his wedding gift to his two best friends. He didn’t actually have the time, let alone the money, to buy them an appropriate gift.

He was currently arguing with the head cook _and_ the baker about the wedding feast. They wanted to make it a huge affair, with _all_ the favorite dishes of the King and future Queen. Merlin was arguing that due to the lack of guests- not many nobles _or_ neighboring royalty could attend on such short notice -not that much food was actually needed. After a few more minutes of arguing, they found a happy medium and he was able to finally leave the kitchens.

That was just the latest debacle of his day. He’d already had to listen to the royal gardener complain about _his_ roses and other greenery being pillaged. The man in charge of the wine cellar didn’t believe that he’d had the King’s permission to be there. And the seamstresses whined to him that a day and a half wasn’t enough time to create a wedding dress suitable for the future Queen. Fortunately they’d said nothing to her.  At least Gwaine and the other knights hadn’t whined about having to hunt for suitable meat. Sir Leon was taking care of security. Now there was a headache he didn’t want, especially considering Morgana’s unknown status.

He sighed and bent his steps toward Gaius’s chambers. He needed something for his headache and wanted to see how his mentor was faring. Gaius had seemed much better that morning, but was still quite weak.

Merlin opened and closed the door quietly, just in case Gaius was asleep. But as he looked, he saw his mentor sitting up a bit and chatting with Gwen. She looked much different than yesterday—happiness was making her glow. “Hello you two,” he said as they looked over at him.

“Hello, Merlin,” Gwen said, “how are you handling with your extra duties?” She gave him a sparkling smile.

“Oh, um, it’s been . . .” he tried to think of a suitable word, “. . . interesting. But everyone’s cooperating so far and everything should be ready on time.”

“Thank you so much for doing all this! I know what it must be like . . . uh oh, speaking of the time, I’ve got to go to another dress fitting.” She rolled her eyes. “They’re making such a fuss! Please Gaius, get plenty of rest. I want you to be there tomorrow night.”

“Of course, My Lady,” Gaius replied.

“And there’ll be no more of this ‘My Lady’ nonsense out of either of you. Do you hear me?”

“Yes, My Lady,” Merlin smirked.

“Watch it, unless you want to be sent to the stocks. I can do that now,” Gwen looked severe before breaking into a grin.

“Okay, Gwen,” Merlin replied. “I’ll see you later.”

“Goodbye, Merlin, Gaius,” she said, and swept out the door.

“Shewill be a fine Queen,” Gaius commented.

“Yeah,” Merlin replied. “She’s certainly got the ordering around down.”

“Merlin, aren’t you supposed to be off discussing flowers or ribbon with someone?”

“Probably.” He winced. “I came back to get something for the headache I’ve gotten from all the ‘discussing’ I’ve already done.” He walked over to the shelves where various remedies were stored and picked up one that was an unappetizing shade of orange. He pulled off the stopper and downed it quickly. “Eugh,” he commented, and went for some water.

“No one’s giving you a hard time, are they?”

“Nothing I can’t handle.” He took a seat by Gaius and sat for a minute, just thinking.

Gaius was loathe to disturb him, but after Merlin had sat unmoving for several minutes, he decided to try it. “What are you pondering so intently?”

Merlin looked startled, but recovered quickly. “I was just thinking . . . Gaius, do you think Morgana survived?”

“Morgana? Why are you worrying about her? You’ve got this wedding to prepare. Besides, from the way you described her, it doesn’t sound like she stood much of a chance.”

“I know, but it’s weird. She should have been laying there when the dust cleared, but she was gone. I looked all around where she’d fallen and found nothing. No trace of her.”

“Why does it bother you so much?”

“I don’t really know. It shouldn’t, but it does. I just have this funny feeling . . . Never mind. She’s probably lying dead out there, somewhere. And I have a lot to do in here.”

“True. How is your headache?”

“Better. But now I really do have to go see someone about ribbon. Or garlands. Or both.” He sighed. “See you later, Gaius!”

“Good luck, Merlin.”


	2. Chapter 2

By dinnertime, Merlin was dragging his feet toward the physician’s chambers again. The headache hadn’t returned, but his shoulders felt knotted up from the stress. He didn’t think he even had the energy to eat. Suddenly an old, familiar voice sounded in his head, “ _Merlin_.”

_Now what_? he thought. “ _Coming_ ,” he replied, and sighed. Kilgharrah should know he’d been dealing with in general.

Merlin changed his course to the nearest door leading out of the castle, walking only slightly faster than he’d been doing. That would probably irritate the old lizard even more, but he didn’t care. This had better be important.

When he got to the clearing, a small white blur flew into him and knocked him over. He laid there in the grass while Aithusa jumped all over him, saying, “ _Merlin Merlin Merlin Merlin Merlin_!” repeatedly in his head. He smiled, then started laughing, his exhaustion vanishing in an instant.

“Aithusa! Ow! You’re getting a little too big for this,” he told the little dragon.

“ _I’m a big dragon now, see?_ ” Aithusa sent a small, but impressive, jet of flame out his mouth.

“I see. Whoa!” Merlin had to jerk his hand back quickly; Aithusa had singed the hair off of it.

Kilgharrah sat laughing in the background. The big dragon was too amused to be irritated by Merlin’s former bad mood. He’d known the dragonlord could use a little time with his “son.”

Aithusa jumped off Merlin and started flying around, sending little spurts of flame at insects. Merlin watched for a moment then sat up to look at the older dragon. “Thank you. For coming to help us in Ealdor. We-I really needed it.”

“You are welcome.”

“I’m sorry for acting annoyed earlier. You wouldn’t _believe_ everything I’ve had to do today.” He flopped back on the grass again.

“Oh, I think I’ve some idea. You’ve had a very long week. That is why I brought Aithusa—I felt you could use a diversion.”

“Oh, right.” He looked up at Aithusa again, now flying in loops.

“ _Merlin Merlin Merlin_ ,” came into his head again. “ _Ball!_ ”

Merlin sat up again and cupped his hands. “ _Leóhtfæt_ ,” he said, and a glowing ball of light appeared in his hands. “ _Onstíðe_.” The ball firmed up a bit, and he threw it in the air. Aithusa swooped toward it and bounced it off his head and back into the air. This was a favorite game of Aithusa’s. Merlin laid there and watched for a while, tossing the ball back up when it fell.

Soon he had to fight to keep his eyes open. “I’d better go back before I fall asleep out here. Arthur will kill me if I didn’t show up on time tomorrow.” Kilgharrah laughed heartily while Aithusa swooped back down to land on Merlin before he could stand. He just scooped the little dragon into his arms and plopped him on the ground. “Be good, Aithusa.”

“ _Bye, Merlin_ ,” Aithusa thought to him.

“Bye, Aithusa, and thanks again Kilgharrah.”

“My pleasure, Young Warlock. Until next time.” Merlin backed up several paces and both dragons flapped their wings to prepare for flight. He watched as they took off and thought, I’ll never get used to that sight.

**xxxXxxx**

Morgana tossed and turned in her bed for a while before she fell asleep. Part of her didn’t want to experience the little dragon’s memories again. The other part of her just wanted to sleep, and _damn the consequences_! Eventually the exhaustion won out and she fell into a deep sleep.

_She was flying this time, and could feel Aithusa’s sheer enjoyment at the freedom it afforded. The cool night air felt brisk, as it ran over his wings. Soon he and Kilgharrah came to a familiar mountain range. Home. If he couldn’t be with his dragonlord, he wanted to be here in his mentor’s roost. The cave was large, roomy enough for both dragons. It was high, higher than man could easily climb._

_The two dragons swept into the darkness, but it wasn’t dark to their eyes. The sun was beginning to rise in the east. Bedtime. Aithusa glided over to his little nest, going just a bit too far. That prompted the older dragon to chuckle a bit, which made Aithusa squawk indignantly. He hopped back to his nest and settled inside it until he was cozy._

_“Sleep well, Little One,” Kilgharrah thought to him. “Dream big dreams.”_

_“Goodnight, Wise One,” Aithusa answered, then yawned. He closed his eyes. Morgana saw nothing but darkness for a moment, then colors and sound assaulted her._

_Bright red and green flashed in her mind. Pendragon red cloaks amidst green trees; knights on horseback. The one in the front had golden hair--the Once and Future King, Aithusa’s mind supplied._ Arthur _, thought Morgana. But “Once and Future King” seemed familiar, like she’d heard it before_ somewhere _. What did it mean?_

_Arthur and his knights rode through the woods, and one not dressed in a cloak rode up next to him._ Merlin _, Aithusa thought happily. Then, Aithusa’s mood changed- danger was coming. Run King, run Emrys!_ Emrys? _Where? Morgana didn’t see the old man anywhere. Arthur and Merlin talked, oblivious to whatever danger Aithusa sensed. Suddenly many men ran down a hill toward the knights and they started fighting. Morgana sensed Aithusa’s panic and worry for the men of Camelot. Fight King, fight! No Merlin, look out! Arthur fought several men successfully, but Merlin was hit with a mace by a man on horseback. That seemed familiar to Morgana for some reason._

_She watched as Arthur dragged Merlin away from the battle. They slept in the woods, but that went by fast. Soon Arthur was carrying Merlin again, toward Camelot. Aithusa started to panic again—run King, run! Protect Emrys! Nooo, protect King! She watched men ambush Arthur in a trench after he’d laid Merlin down. They were soon separated. Aithusa focused on Merlin, who watched the King fight. More men ran past him. Protect! Wailed Aithusa. Morgana watched in horrified fascination as Merlin softly said, “_ Gewican ge stanas _!” and boulders fell between him and Arthur._

_Morgana felt Aithusa giggle in his sleep, pleased at Merlin’s success. King safe. Merlin not safe, but Merlin’s strong. He will be safe soon. The picture faded as Aithusa fell into deeper sleep. The little dragon’s memory faded._

The witch woke slowly. Aithusa’s memory had been a dream, and now that she was awake, she recognized what event the dream portrayed. It was the time Agravaine had leaked Arthur’s route home from treaty negotiations. She recognized some of the bandits as men she’d hired to ambush his party; they’d brought her _Merlin_ instead of Arthur. Idiots! But she’d gotten to torture him with the fomorroh. And even though that plot had failed, it had been fun to see him squirm, poor Merlin. _Poor Merlin_? _Ugh, I need to clear my head_.

She got up and walked out to the courtyard, still thinking. The dragon had called Arthur the Once and Future King. She’d never heard him called that. But the phrase still seemed familiar; she was sure she’d read it someplace before.

And Emrys. Aithusa had called to him, but he hadn’t been there, had he? There was only one person in the dream who’d used magic, and he was the one person she’d never expected to have it. Fury flooded her veins. How could he not tell her?! He had been right there in Camelot, watching her suffer, and hadn’t said a word! Why?! So many things could have been different if he’d told her, _so_ many. And she may never have known Morgause, but wouldn’t have lived alone in a hovel, with only Arthur’s pig uncle as occasional company.

Another part of her mind whispered, maybe he was afraid. He also lived under Uther, fearing for his life every day. And you were close to Uther. Maybe he was afraid you’d tell Uther about him. _Shut up!_ She told that part of her mind. But the thoughts didn’t go away; they just faded into the background.

She began to feel tired again, so she made her way back to the bedroom, both hoping and fearing she’d dream another memory. The part of her that felt softer was getting stronger and harder to fight off. She needed to come up with another plan soon, before she lost her hard edge.

The bed called to her tired mind and body, and she surrendered herself to it readily.

_She found herself in that clearing again, the one where Aithusa had been hatched. Kilgharrah sat on the ground talking to Merlin. The warlock- that’s what he was, Morgana realized -was telling the old dragon about his failed attempts to kill the king. But Aithusa was barely listening. He was playing a favorite game—chasing insects and burning them with his little flame. She felt the simple joy and pride the little dragon felt as he burned more than got away. But he soon tired of that game and swooped down to drop on Merlin’s shoulder, disrupting the conversation._

_“Aithusa, what—” Merlin got out, before the little dragon bumped heads with him. “Ow, what was that for, you little monster?”_

_“Play, Merlin, play!” Aithusa thought to him._

_She could see the warlock frown for a moment before a light came into his eyes. “All right Aithusa, how about this?” He cupped his hand in front of him and said, “_ Leóhtfæt. _” A blue ball of light formed in his hand and he held it up so the little dragon could see. “This is a ball. It bounces on anything. Try it!” He threw it high into the air._

_Aithusa leaped into the air, excited to see what this new toy, this “ball,” would do. He flew toward it, touching it on its way down. To his disappointment, the ball faded into nothing. “Merlin!” he whined, mind to mind._

_“Oops, that didn’t work. Hmm,” Merlin thought. He pondered for a moment while Aithusa flapped impatiently in the air above him. “Oh, I know.” He held out his hand again and said, “_ Leóhtfæt. Onstíðe. _” He bounced the ball experimentally in his hand a couple of times; it stayed solid. “Here you go Little One. Bounce this around. Try to keep it in the air.” He threw it to the waiting dragon._

_Aithusa swooped under the glowing orb. This time it bounced off his back and into the air. He giggled mentally, pleased at his new toy. He began bouncing it off various parts of his body, laughing when it hit because it tickled pleasantly. When the ball fell toward the ground, he’d fly under it. He began experimenting with hitting it with different forces, and giggled when it went higher or lower. Morgana felt a little impatient at the enthusiastic dragon. She’d rather hear the conversation between Merlin and Kilgharrah._

_Fortunately for her, the little dragon soon tired and started playing with the ball at Kilgharrah’s feet. She was able to pick up the conversation. Merlin was speaking “—and she put up_ quite _a good fight. She managed to throw me around_ really _hard. I have the bruises to prove it!” What was he talking about? Who’d been beating him up?_

_“You could put an end to your ‘trauma’ if you simply_ ended _her life,” Kilgharrah replied._

_“I know, I know. But something stops me every time I face her. I just can’t do it. I can’t kill Morgana.” Oh,_ she’d _been beating him up. But she didn’t remember throwing him . . . wait, he_ can’t _kill her?_

_“I have told you over and over again—”_

_“Yes I know. Darkness and light, hatred and love. I get it. Moving on . . . I finally knocked her out cold with this little whirlwind. Then, I picked up the jar and built a fire to throw the snake-thing in. Good riddance!”_

_Morgana didn’t hear Kilgharrah’s reply. Merlin had said he’d knocked her out with a whirlwind. But the only time she’d been knocked out by a whirlwind had been when Emrys had broken into her house and taken  . . . the . . . fomorroh. Oh. My . . . did this mean what she thought? Merlin_ was _Emrys? That was impossible, wasn’t it? He wasn’t old enough or powerful enough. Although, if he_ was _able to do that whirlwind, he’d easily be able to make himself look old. But still . . ._

She didn’t even notice that she’d woken up. The sun was rising in the east and lit her face. She blinked and realized that she’d transitioned from sleep to waking seamlessly. That hardly ever happened to her anymore. She shook her head and got out of bed to start her day.

**xxxXxxx**

Aithusa really should be sleeping right now. Dragons weren’t normally nocturnal, but due to the mad king’s rampage, he and Kilgharrah didn’t dare go out during the day. He wanted to find the woman and see how she was faring. See if that little spark of goodness in her had grown at all.

He looked over at Kilgharrah. The older dragon _appeared_ to be asleep. Aithusa flapped his wings a bit to make noise, but Kilgharrah didn’t stir. The little dragon happily hopped out of his little nest and walked awkwardly over to the cave’s entrance. His mentor stayed motionless, so Aithusa stretched his wings for flight and took off.

The little dragon stayed close to the tree tops. It wouldn’t do to be spotted; he did listen to Kilgharrah _most_ of the time. He quickly flew to the place where he’d healed the dark woman. She wasn’t there, but he could feel her magical signature, and it led into the forest.

He followed her magical trail to a little hill. Her magic had been concentrated here, but all he saw was a collapsed dwelling she’d probably lived in. But no more. He continued following her and came to the little lake with a waterfall. She’d used her magic here, too. He went through the waterfall, even though he could have gone over it. Behind the waterfall was a tunnel that he followed until it came out into open air again. _A clever hiding place_! Her trail led to and ended at a small castle.

Aithusa flew out over the castle, but didn’t see the dark woman. _She must be inside the castle_. He flew to an opening and inside. This castle wasn’t fancy like the one the Once and Future King and Merlin lived in. It still had a lot of rooms, though. The little dragon grumbled in annoyance before he started flying in and out of rooms.

He finally found her in a room filled with dusty, bound parchment. These were called . . . books? These were impractical for dragons since they could easily catch fire. Aithusa swooped inside the room and landed on the table, right next to where the woman was sitting. She nearly fell over when she jumped out of her chair, but stopped when she realized it was him.

“Oh, it’s you!” the woman said.

Oh, talking. Aithusa hadn’t considered that. But she was magical, so she should be able to communicate with mind-speech. He decided to try. “ _Yes, me. I healed you_.”

“How did you do that?” the dark woman asked, her eyes wide with surprised.

He giggled a bit. Her eyes looked funny like that. “ _Oh. You don’t know mind-speech. Um, just talk in your mind and push it into the other’s mind with magic. Easy_.”

“ _You can’t speak out loud?_ ” he heard in his mind.

“ _You did it!_ ” Aithusa jumped up and down a bit in his excitement. “ _Yes, dark woman. I cannot speak out loud yet. My mentor and my . . . father are teaching me_.”

“Is it all right if I speak out loud?” Aithusa nodded. “Did you call me ‘woman’?”

“ _Yes, I call you ‘dark woman.’ When I found you, you all dark. Dark clothes, dark hair, darkness in heart. But I saw a . . . spark of good in you, so I saved you. You badly hurt_.”

“Ohh. My name is Morgana. You can call me by my name. If I have darkness in my heart, why did you save me?”

Oh no. She was the evil witch Morgana that Merlin and Kilgharrah had warned him about and told him to stay away from. Should he still talk to her? She didn’t seem evil now, just curious. And the spark of good had grown some since he’d last seen her. “ _Yes,_ Morgana _. I saw your darkness, but I saw that you were not always dark. You were light once, and you can be again. Light means you can be saved, and you have spark of light_.”

Morgana looked very surprised at this idea, like she didn’t know about the light. _Maybe she didn’t_. But he could see why—the darkness was so thick around her.

“Please Aithusa—your name is Aithusa, isn’t it?”

Now Aithusa was surprised. “ _Yes, but how did you know this?_ ”

“Aithusa, I’ve been dreaming your memories ever since you healed me. Do you know how this happened?”

“ _I don’t know how this happens. When I healed you, I felt some of my thoughts go into you, to help you feel better and choose a better path. I didn’t mean for you to see my memories_.”

“I am a seer. Is it possible that your healing affected my seer magic?”

“ _I don’t know. Dragons are seers by nature, but I haven’t heard how our magic affects other seers who aren’t dragons. I need to ask my mentor_.”

“Your mentor—Kilgharrah?”

“ _Did my memories tell you this?_ ”

Morgana nodded.

Aithusa was worried now. If she knew that, what else did she know? “ _Did my memories tell you more?_ ”

“I know about your dragonlord, Merlin. I knew Merlin when I lived in Camelot. Your memories told me he has magic and that Arthur, my brother, is the ‘Once and Future King.’ But I don’t know what that means. And you spoke of someone named Emrys in the dream I saw.”

Oh no. His memories had told Morgana a lot. Too much. Merlin and Kilgharrah would be very angry with him.  But how was he supposed to have known that the dark woman was the witch Morgana? What should he do now? “ _Morgana, it seems you really are seeing my memories. I’ll go back to Kilgharrah and ask him about this. I’m sorry, but I cannot explain what you saw right now. But I will come back_.”

“Wait, don’t go yet—please. Thank you for healing me.”

“ _You are welcome.”_ He looked at her a moment. _“There is hope for you, if you really want it_.” He flapped his wings and took off, flying out of the room and the castle. Morgana was a very interesting person, and he was glad he’d saved her. Only time would tell if his faith in her was justified.


	3. Chapter 3

Morgana sat at the table in the castle’s library. She hadn’t expected to see the little dragon again, and was amazed at the wisdom it- he? -had shown for one so young. What an amazing little creature! She’d come to the library to find references to the Once and Future King and Emrys. And she had learned something here, just not what she’d been expecting. Feeling hungry, she decided to find something to eat then come back to the library.

When she returned she decided, on instinct, to look on a different shelf. It was crammed full of rolled parchments, coated in years, if not decades of filth. She filled her arms with them and then shoved aside the books on the table she had been perusing, before dumping the rolls in the now vacant space. Clouds of dust rose into the air, tickling her nose and causing her to sneeze.

She selected a scroll at random and unrolled it. Across the top it read: _Prophecies of the Druid Seer Aganthus, part four_. She smirked. A druid seer huh? She was closer already, and settled back in her chair to read.

After quite a while- it seemed like hours but probably wasn’t -she finished reading the scroll. Nothing on it mentioned what she was looking for, but it was still very interesting. If all these scrolls were the prophecies from the same seer, it might help to put them in order so she could make sense of them later. It would be worthwhile to see how the mind of another seer worked, even if this one hadn’t said anything she wanted to know now. So she set to work unrolling the scrolls and laying them out. There were twelve of them and they _were_ all about the same seer. So she picked up _Part One_ and began reading again.

She’d gotten to Part Five before she had to break again for dinner. By now she really wished the castle had more comfortable chairs. After her dinner, she walked around to her garden again and ripped out the mess of weeds. Tomorrow she’d come back to plant seeds and give them a bit of magical encouragement.

At last, Morgana returned to her library. She continued reading where she’d left off. _It’s a good thing this stuff is interesting_. Finally, when she got to the seventh scroll, she found what she’d been looking for:

_And a time shall come, when a great and powerful king shall suffer such a loss that his heart shall thereafter be turned against the practice of magic. Many shall suffer death at his rage, but lo, this shall not be the end of magic, for that can never be. At that day, two shall be born that will return the Old Religion to its former glory. One shall be called the Once and Future King—for not only shall he reign at this time, but in the distant future as well. He will be bring about a Golden Age for all people in Albion, for he shall unite all kingdoms into one. But he will not do this alone; for the second born shall be the greatest warlock to ever walk the earth, past, present or future. He shall be called Emrys and will protect and guide the Once and Future King then and in the future to come._

Morgana’s mouth fell open. The Cailleach  had failed to tell her the “greatest warlock ever” bit. Great, now she had an even bigger reason to be afraid of him. How was she going to sleep after this news?

**xxxXxxx**

Surprisingly, Morgana went right to sleep. She’d expected to dream Aithusa’s memories, so when they came she didn’t fight them.

_Aithusa was giggling. The view from his eyes rolled over and over and Morgana started getting dizzy. She heard other laughing and caught bits of Merlin’s face. He and the little dragon were wrestling on the grass. The amount of pure love flowing from dragon to warlock and back took her breath away. They finally stopped rolling, but Merlin started tickling Aithusa instead._

_“I’m fine, Kilgharrah,” Merlin said. “I’m much more worried for Gaius. The torture took a lot out of him and he’s no spring chicken. But it’s odd how that Catha suddenly just stopped torturing him.”_

_“They train specifically to torture others. But it is interesting how he turned on Morgana.”_

_“I was so sure he was going to give me away, right in front of her. I mean, she asked him if he knew who Emrys was, and he was staring right at me when he said he did. He came right up to me and told her he knew where Emrys was.” Aithusa got free and chased after ground insects._

_“And did he refuse to tell her?”_

_“Yes. He threw her against the wall then pledged to serve me. He told me that he knew how I felt, being hunted. And he said he didn’t have my ‘great powers’ even though he looked pretty powerful to me. Kilgharrah, he told me he shares my hopes for the world I’ll build, and there are many more like him who would give their lives to help me.”_

_“Of course there are. You shun your role as Emrys, but the Catha, the druids and many more know about you.  They have been waiting for you for a very long time. You can’t forget about them; freeing them is another part of your destiny.”_

_“It’s hard to remember when I’m off chasing after the other part of my destiny. Or washing his socks . . .”_

_“Merlin, relax. He’s not going anywhere right now.”_

_“Yes, but who knows when I’ll have to avert the next crisis.” He sighed. “As much as I’d like to stay here all night, I’d better get back. Thanks for listening, old friend.” Aithusa gave a little indignant squeak. “Oh, you too, little friend. Come here, you.”_

_Aithusa hopped over to the warlock, who’d stood up. “Love you!” he thought to his human father-figure. He stretched his little wings out to give a dragon-y hug. He pushed his head into Merlin’s chest and made satisfied noises._

_Merlin hugged him back and said, “Love you too, Little One.” He petted Aithusa’s head and back as well as he could. Morgana again felt the warmth and love flowing between them. There was no deception, no intimidation in them. Nothing negative. Pure kindness and concern radiated through the clearing. It took Morgana’s breath away._

The witch woke in her bed. Those feelings she’d felt through Aithusa were what she wanted . . . what she c _raved_. She hadn’t felt them since Morgause had taken her from Camelot. Morgause had loved her, but was always pushing her to become more, to achieve more, and somehow her sister’s desires had become her own. She hadn’t even wanted to become Queen until Morgause had put the thought in her head.

_Emrys_. She’d discovered his identity. She should be angrier at Alator, but she wasn’t, like she’d already exhausted it for him. But _Merlin_ , that was different. She could now add Emrys’ transgressions to his. Why, _why_ had he never actually killed her? He’d had plenty of opportunities to do so. And plenty of opportunities to help her. Why hadn’t he? Would she even have turned against Camelot? All these things she was seeing through Aithusa—this kind, loving Merlin, _Emrys_ , didn’t fit with the picture she’d formed of either man. He seemed more like the one she’d known before Morgause took her away. Did that mean she was the one who had changed, not him?

All these opposing thoughts were confusing her, making her head hurt. She needed more sleep, but it seemed unlikely that she’d get it. She’d need a potion or meditation to help. A potion would take too long, so meditation it was. She sat up in a comfortable position, held her hands in her lap and closed her eyes. She regulated her breathing and focused on thinking absolutely nothing. After a few moments, she felt herself relax, but her mind didn’t stay blank. Old and new images came at her, mixed in a way they never had before.

_Morgana saw herself lying on the floor at the Isle of the Blessed. Then, she_ was _suddenly herself, looking up at the Cailleach. “Tearing the veil between the worlds has created a new world, and you will not walk through it alone. The one they call Emrys will walk in your shadow. He is your destiny, and he is your doom. Emrys." She felt a chill run through her body as the Cailleach straightened then disappeared, only leaving behind her chilling laugh._

_The scene shifted, and she stood, unseen, in a dark cave. Merlin lay on the floor, looking up at Kilgharrah, who was perched outside the cave._

_“I need to get back to Camelot. The kingdom is in danger and . . . it's my fault. I should've listened to you. I should never have trusted Morgana,” Merlin said._

_“You did what you felt was right and that shows great courage, but trust is a double edged sword,” the dragon replied._

_“I thought . . . because she has magic . . . I thought we were the same.”_

_“In some ways you are.”_

_“No. I will never be like her.”_

_“You have learnt an important lesson, Merlin. Your determination to see goodness in people will be your undoing. But I fear that your futures are now joined forever. She is the darkness to your light, the hatred to your love.”_

_The scene shifted again, to that of a familiar dream—Red and black banners lie strewn on a battlefield with knights’ corpses. A raven sitting on a helmet cawed and took flight. A gleaming sword was stuck in something, the ground or a knight's chest perhaps. Emrys walked on the field with a white staff, looking down at her._

_“Help me, Emrys. Please,” She said, her wrinkled hand reached up to Emrys from her position on the ground._

_“Is this really what you wanted, Morgana?” Emrys answered._

_“Please . . .”_

_Suddenly the figure before her wavered then became the Merlin she knew now. He gave her a troubled look, like he was about to do something he didn’t want to do. “It doesn’t have to be like this. We can find another way.”_

_Instead of replying as she had then, she said, “What other way? It’s all over now.  Do what you have to do.”_

_“No, it’s not over yet.” He waved his hand and the scene around them changed. It was a bright, sunny day. They stood on a grassy hill overlooking Camelot. Instead of her black dress, she wore a beautiful blue one._

_Morgana gasped, and looked at Merlin. “What happened—the battlefield . . ?”_

_“That hasn’t happened yet. It might never happen. It all depends on you.”_

_“How? Why?”_

_“You could continue your current path, conquering Camelot by force. Or you could choose another way, changing minds and hearts through patience and love. One leads to bloodshed and hollow victory. The other to a golden age, where_ all _will be free to be themselves.”_

_“Why now?”_

_“A dragon has chosen to heal you. For him to do so, he must have seen something in you worth saving. You’re not completely evil, not yet. Choose carefully, Morgana. The happiness of many lies in your hands.”_

Morgana’s eyes snapped open. This wasn’t one of Aithusa’s memories, or one of her prophetic dreams. Not exactly, anyway. Certain elements had been, but others she’d never seen. When had Merlin had that conversation with his dragon? And their futures were joined together? Darkness, light? Hatred, love?

Sshe evidently had a choice to make. Good or evil. But was it that simple? It sounded like both ways would be a lot of work. She had started out only wanting Uther’s life to end and had somehow reached the point where no non-magical person deserved to live. Was that really what she wanted? To get the throne and free her people, she’d have to kill old friends and the many people who disagreed with her. She’d have to gain followers, raise an army, and find the resources . . . a lot of work.

On the other hand, turning good would require . . . what? Giving up her revenge, her throne, her _power_? Did “ _all_ will be free to be themselves” mean those with magic would be able to use it? But she’d be with her friends, her family again. She’d have to apologize, repent of her transgressions and maybe spend time in the dungeon. Was all this worth the promised freedom?

AH! She was getting nowhere, and the sun was already up. Working outside in her garden after breakfast would help clear her mind for a while. Then maybe reason could return.

**xxxXxxx**

Merlin woke that morning, happy for several things. First, the wedding was _over_. Second, he didn’t have to tend the King this morning. Not that he’d want to; walking into the newlyweds’ room could be embarrassing. And third, he didn’t have to do a thing for Gwen’s coronation. What a beautiful day this would be!

Later, after enjoying his free time by lingering in bed, eating a leisurely breakfast and catching up on some reading he’d been wanting to do, he went to the royal chambers. _Someone_ had to help the King get dressed for his new wife’s coronation.

He knocked on the door, then opened it with his eyes closed. He heard laughing and closed the door behind him. He didn’t open his eyes until . . .

Arthur said, “Okay Merlin, you can open your eyes.”

The King and future Queen were sitting at their table, feeding each other breakfast. Gwen was fully dressed; Arthur still had his sleep clothes on. Merlin rolled his eyes and tried not to gag at their sugary sweetness. Although it wasn’t too hard—they _had_ been waiting for this and deserved to be happy. “Glad to see you’re awake, Your Majesties.”

Gwen gave him a look and said, “If you call me ‘Your Majesty’ in private again, I’ll throw you in the stocks.”

“Oh now you’re just letting your power go to your head,” Merlin replied, laughing.

“That is not an empty threat,” Arthur said, “I’m so proud of you, my love.” He gave her a quick kiss.

Merlin just rolled his eyes again and asked, “Are you done, Arthur? The coronation is very soon.”

“Oh fine, ruin my fun then,” the King replied. But he stood up and went to his dressing screen to wait for Merlin to drape his clothes over it. In no time at all, he was dressed and ready to escort his bride down to her coronation ceremony.

Gwen waited outside the hall while Arthur and Merlin went inside to take their positions. Merlin felt a strange sense of loss, like someone was missing from the scene. He’d had an odd dream this morning—he dreamed he was telling Morgana there was another way again, but this time she was listening. It seemed incredible that she would stop trying to kill him for long enough to listen to reason. But if she _had_ originally listened to him, maybe she _would_ be here, seeing her best friend crowned Queen. He shook off his odd thought process and turned his attention to the aisle Gwen was now ascending.

**xxxXxxx**

Morgana brushed the dirt from her hands and turned from her little garden. With a little luck and the right spells, the vegetables would be full-grown by morning. Fresh food would be lovely after all the dried and stale things she’d been eating. Thinking about eating made her realize that it was time for lunch.

As she ate, her mind went back to the vision she’d experienced while meditating. Merlin- _Emrys_ -had featured in it quite prominently. She’d read the prophecy about him and Arthur bringing about a golden age and then she’d had the vision. He’d told her to make a choice that would bring about destruction or the Golden Age. But why would _he_ be the one sent to tell her this?

She suddenly had the desire to look into Merlin’s life. It came out of nowhere, but she gave in anyway. Morgause had kept her scrying crystal somewhere in this castle, and had showed Morgana how to use it. She’d never gotten the chance to try it, but this was as good a reason as any to do so.

She found the room again—the castle was small but still a virtual maze.The large white crystal sat on a pedestal in the middle of the room. It looked rather benign, but Morgana knew it could be anything but. She walked over to it, looking to see which face would best suit her purpose. When she’d decided, she held her hand over the crystal and said, “ _Ætíe mé þá þé ic séce_.”

Nothing happened. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, reaching into her center of magic. She repeated, “ _Ætíe mé þá þé ic séce_.” When she opened her eyes and looked into the crystal, she saw three figures she immediately identified as Arthur, Gwen and Merlin. They were sitting in Arthur’s chambers, talking. Arthur was dressed in his regal finery and Gwen wore a beautiful purple dress and her crown. Morgana fought down her anger and concentrated harder so she could hear what they said.

_“It looks like you two are enjoying married life,” Merlin commented._

This must be the present she was Seeing.

_Arthur and Gwen exchanged a look and Gwen answered, “Oh, we are.”_

_“I highly recommend it,” Arthur said._

_“Well, it couldn’t have happened to two better people,” Merlin replied._

_Suddenly Gwen got a sly look on her face. “So, Merlin, when will your turn be?”_

_Merlin’s face flushed red. “Oh, um, I uh, I don’t know.”_

_Gwen and Arthur chuckled. “Come now, you must have met a suitable girl here by now,” Arthur said._

_“I know quite a few kitchen maids who’d love a chance to even talk with you,” Gwen added._

_Merlin blushed more. “If you must know, this slave-driver master of mine,” he pointed at Arthur, “keeps me so busy that I have hardly time to breathe, let alone meet girls.”_

_Arthur shook his head. “Surely you’ve met some at the tavern. You do spend a_ lot _of time there.”_

_Merlin rolled his eyes. “I’ve told you, I don’t_ go _to the tavern.”_

_“You’re not changing the subject_ that _easily,” Gwen said._

_“Great,” Merlin replied._

_“Has there ever been someone?” Gwen asked gently._

_“Oh, there has,” Merlin said._

_“Well?” Gwen and Arthur asked together._

_“One . . . girl died shortly after I met her. But I loved her and would have given up everything for her.”_

_Gwen put a comforting hand on his. “Oh Merlin, I’m so sorry. Life is so cruel sometimes.”_

_Merlin nodded. “And the second girl . . . well, she might as well be dead. She’s . . . she’s gone out of my life and I may never see her again. I don’t think she even knew how I felt anyway.”_

_Arthur and Gwen thought a moment before Gwen asked, “Merlin, was this second girl Morgana?”_

_Merlin and Arthur looked at her like she’d gone crazy. “N-no Gwen, how could you ask that? She’s evil and she hates me.”_

_But Arthur smirked. “I remembered how I caught you taking flowers to her and you denied it.”_

_“Oh yes, that’s right,” Gwen agreed, “He actually brought her flowers_ several _times. And I noticed how you looked at her when she came into a room. Ohhh, I see it now.”_

_Merlin blushed again. “You two don’t believe me, do you?” The royal couple shook their heads. Merlin sighed. “Fine. Yes, I liked her. But then she came back to Camelot with ill intent and that feeling gradually faded away. She hates me now.”_ Morgana felt her heart beat faster at his confession, but slow in disappointment when he said his feelings had gone away _._ That was crazy _._

_Arthur and Gwen looked at each other again, not knowing what to say. Finally Gwen spoke, “Merlin, again, I’m so sorry. We can’t help whom we fall for, huh?” She reached over and gave him a quick hug._

_“Well, you could just find her and tell her the truth. See what she says—maybe she’ll come round,” Arthur said. Merlin and Gwen both turned to him and glared._

_“Yeah, clotpole, maybe you’ll make me your chief advisor and change your mind about magic, too,” Merlin said spitefully._

_Arthur held up his hands in surrender. “Well, the truth worked for me. Anyway, it sounds like plenty of other girls are interested in you. Might as well give them a shot.”_

_“Thanks Arthur. I’ll do that in my abundant free time—if I ever get any! Now please, just stay out of my nonexistent love life, okay?” Merlin pled._

_“All right. Now, Guinevere, what about the . . .”_

Morgana ended the spell before Arthur finished his sentence. She’d heard quite enough! That conversation had told her quite a bit—Arthur and Gwen were married and Gwen had been crowned Queen. It surprised Morgana to think that Merlin had ever loved a woman, but even more to think that he might have actually liked her.

Merlin had liked her?! The idea seemed impossible. But maybe it explained why he hadn’t killed her despite his many opportunities to do so. But if he felt that way, why had he poisoned her? His words didn’t make sense if she thought about _that_ near miss. But he’d still liked her until he’d discovered her treachery more than a year after that. Ugh. Men are confusing!

And here she was again, feeling warm and fuzzy about that vile betrayer. But suddenly she couldn’t summon the bitterness that usually went with that thought. What was happening to her? Were Aithusa’s memories affecting her that much? Ahh! She felt like kicking something.

She was Morgana, High Priestess of the Triple Goddess. The most powerful witch alive. Rightful Queen of Camelot and Savior of all magical people. Then why did she feel so shamed by this simple servant? A peasant from and insignificant village with nothing to his name. Nothing but immense power and a destiny that could change the world. Who was she kidding?

Maybe if she took off her bracelet tonight she could see the future and what her choice would be. Maybe if she actually saw this Golden Age then she would believe. And maybe she’d see if she was on the wrong side.


	4. Chapter 4

Aithusa had gotten away with his trip to see Morgana. Kilgharrah hadn’t asked him about it, which meant Aithusa could probably do it again. That was exciting! Morgana was a very interesting person. She wasn’t as evil as Merlin and his mentor had made her out to be.

He wanted to visit her again the next morning, and was planning to use hunting for food as an excuse for staying out “late.” He’d see if the light within her had grown and maybe answer some of her questions. She appeared to know a lot about him, Kilgharrah, Merlin, and the Once and Future King anyway. And she wouldn’t hurt him. He may be small, but he could still produce fire and knew other spells besides. Dragons were immune to the humans’ magic anyway.

After he and Kilgharrah had flown a bit, and the older dragon had finished his lessons, Aithusa asked for permission to hunt. Kilgharrah allowed it reluctantly, and returned to their cave to sleep. The little dragon flew to Morgana’s small castle, humming all the way.

Aithusa flew over the castle; all seemed quiet. He flew in the entrance, and poked his head in various doors to find Morgana. Suddenly he heard a short scream followed by several unintelligible words. He followed the sounds and found Morgana twisting and turning on her bed. She stilled for a few moments, then started crying and saying, “No!” This pattern continued for several more minutes. She didn’t seem to be in any physical danger, so the little dragon let her continue. When the sun had barely peeked over the horizon, Morgana startled awake with a gasp.

“What? Where?” she said, looking around. Surprised by Aithusa, she said, “Oh, Aithusa! You came back!”

“ _Morgana, what was happening to you? Bad dreams?_ ” Aithusa asked.

“Yes. When I don’t wear my special bracelet, I have prophetic dreams.”

“ _Like me?_ ”

“Like you, yes. Mine are rarely pleasant.”

“ _Will you tell me about yours? Maybe I can help_.”

“All right. Before tonight, I’ve had several of your memories and a vision that seem to center around Emrys, or as I know him, Merlin. But the dream I just had was different.” She took a deep breath and started telling her dream.

“I started dreaming a pleasant dream _—_ I was in a beautiful castle, looking out the window. There was an overwhelming feeling of love and warmth surrounding me. Suddenly the vision changed, and I was standing in a dark, crumbling castle, looking out over an icy landscape. All I felt was hatred and a huge desire for vengeance—more than I’ve ever felt before. Then the dream scene changed, and everything after that continued in the same pattern—a beautiful, loving scene then a dark hate-filled scene.

You, a bit older flying happily—you, a bit older, your skin dulled and your legs and wings twisted.

An older Mordred, being knighted and using magic to save Arthur—an older Mordred stabbing me in the side.

Me, sitting at a circular table, conversing with several Kings and Queens—me walking in an unfamiliar throne room, a King and a Princess on their knees in front of me.

Me, hugging Gwen as she snuggles a newborn babe in her arms—me throwing Gwen into a dark room, as she pleads with me.

Me, facing Merlin, our arms twisted around together, tipping goblets into each other’s’ mouths—me pouring something dark into Merlin’s mouth, a young boy watching.

Gwen, raising her goblet to toast something brilliant Arthur has done—Gwen putting drops of something into a goblet and handing it to Arthur.

Arthur and Gwen splashing around in a lake, laughing—Arthur and Gwen standing in water while a strange old woman performs a spell.

Me, shaking Alator’s hand and leading him into a lavish banquet—me standing over Alator with a little hissing snake.

Me, looking across a crowded ballroom at Mordred dancing with a beautiful girl—me sitting on a decaying throne, looking down at Mordred.

Me and Merlin standing in a crystal-covered cave, holding hands—me in the same cave, yelling hateful things at Merlin.

Me and Merlin standing next to Arthur while he makes a proclamation to the court—me standing over a frail Arthur while Merlin stabs me.”

“It seemed like I was seeing bits of me in two very different lives. And I think I know which I’d prefer,” Morgana concluded.

“ _That’s a very unusual dream. Why would you have it now?_ ” Aithusa looked into Morgana’s heart. The spark of goodness had grown considerably.

“Yesterday morning I had a vision. I was shown things about mine and Merlin’s destinies. Then he came into my vision and told me a choice—I could continue my current path of destruction or choose to embrace love and light. He said that you healed me because you found something good in me.”

“ _That’s true. I saw a spark of goodness hidden deep within you, so I healed you in hope that you’d choose a better path_.”

“But why am I experiencing these things _now_?”

“ _You stand at a crossroads of life. Destiny has granted this to you, hoping that you have learned from your mistakes. Surely you can see the different consequences in your dream?_ ”

“I can. I just have so much to think about already.” She sat up and thought for a moment. “Come, let’s have breakfast. I have fresh vegetables outside.”

Aithusa flew to perch on her shoulder and he and Morgana journeyed through the castle and around it to the garden. “ _Vegetables, hmm_.” Aithusa thought. “ _Do you have any meat?_ ”

“No, I ate my last dried bit last night. But you’re free to hunt in these woods.” She pointed to the forest just on the other side of the garden.

“ _Thank you, I will. I must take something to Kilgharrah anyway. I said I would be hunting; I must hide my interactions with you still_.”

Aithusa was small, but strong. It didn’t take him long to take down two deer and bring them to Morgana. One he left at the castle’s entrance. The other he carried inside to a room Morgana indicated. She ate some of her vegetables, then helped Aithusa skin and gut the deer. The little dragon kept back part to eat while Morgana built a fire and roasted the remainder over it. They talked as she worked.

“I’m curious about something, Aithusa. What is Merlin to you?”

“ _Surely you know from my memories?_ ”

“Yes, but I want to hear you talk about him, and your feelings.”

“ _Okay. Merlin is my dragonlord. He hatched me, so that makes him almost a father. I call him that because I have no other. I know he loves me and I love him back. He always treats me kindly and plays with me. He is teaching me many things about humans, like speech and customs. I wouldn’t be here without him_.”

“Wow. I didn’t know that much about him. He was kind and loving, but I thought he hated me after I came back to Camelot. He always ruined my plans and I never knew how.”

“ _He is Emrys—that was part of his destiny. To protect the Once and Future King and help him bring peace and magic to all Albion_.”

“The Cailleach told me Emrys was my destiny and my doom. Every time I saw him, he was an old man. I’ve been afraid of him for a year, and now I find out that he’s _Merlin_ , of all people. So now I have reason to hate him even more, but I don’t. For some odd reason, I don’t.”

“ _What the Cailleach told you was true. But what destiny and doom mean to you may not be what_ she _meant_.”

“I’ve never thought of it that way. I guess I’ve been interpreting things in a negative way for a long time.”

“ _You have learned a lot, Morgana. You’re beginning to see that there really is more than one view of things and more than one way to accomplish something_.”

“I can see that now. Thank you for helping me!”

“ _You are welcome. I probably should leave now_.” He’d finished his portion of the deer and it was now past mid-morning.

“Thanks for coming again. Will you visit another time?”

“ _If I can manage it. If you need me_.”

“I look forward to it. Goodbye Aithusa!”

“ _Goodbye Morgana_.” Aithusa launched himself into the air and flew through the castle. He stopped to pick up the deer then flew back to the cave he shared with Kilgharrah.

**xxxXxxx**

That night when Morgana went to sleep, she didn’t dream Aithusa’s memories or anything prophetic. In fact, they seemed to be _her_ memories. And they weren’t good ones.

_Every time she’d conspired to kill Uther or tried herself.  First was after Gwen’s father died, then when she’d taken the Crystal of Neahtid. When Morgause had sent the knights of Medhir, and another right after she’d returned to Camelot with the mandrake. The list continued on.  When she’d learned he was her father, during her first brief reign, the Dorocha, and the one that finally succeeded: turning the healing spell against him. All acts borne of fear, resentment, jealousy, misunderstanding, betrayal, and revenge. And she remembered how she’d felt strangely empty after Uther finally died, like . . . regret?_

_All the times she’d hurt or tried to hurt Arthur—again Morgause and the knights of Medhir, indirectly with the mandrake, luring him to the castle of Fyrien, the bracelet on his quest to the Perilous Lands, leading Uther to him and Gwen so they’d get caught, taking over the kingdom and hurting his people twice, releasing the Dorocha, killing Uther, every time Agravaine gave him “advice,” messing with Merlin’s mind, kidnapping and torturing Gaius, bringing back Lancelot, stealing plans and giving Gwen that glamour. It’s strange how most of those were done_ after _she found out she had a “legitimate” claim to the throne. It was only natural to want him out of her way, but she’d had no desire for the throne_ before _Morgause had suggested it._

_Everything she’d done to hurt Gwen—the Castle of Fyrien debacle, revealing her and Arthur to Uther, forcing her to choose between her former best friend and Arthur, when Agravaine mentioned her well-intentioned “interference,” Agravaine advising Arthur to not see her, enchanting her to be with Lancelot, enchanting her to look like a deer, almost killing her during that last battle. Again those were done_ after _she’d determined Arthur was a threat and she’d learned he and Gwen were together—that dream of Gwen’s coronation. She hadn’t stopped it._

_And Merlin/Emrys—keeping his friends under constant threat after she’d returned to Camelot, when he’d followed her to that meeting with Morgause and they’d caught him, when he tried to stop her in the crypt, when he’d tried to stop her from killing Uther, every single minute of the trip to Fyrien’s castle, the fomorroh debacle, trying to eliminate him when he took the fomorroh, kidnapping his mentor, sending the army to Ealdor to look for Arthur. He was constantly wrecking her plans by somehow finding out about them. Now it seemed obvious how he’d done it; by using magic and help from his dragon._

_There were other countless, blurred moments of others she’d hurt on her quest for power and vengeance—the people her undead soldiers had killed, all the Southrons had killed, every person the Dorocha had killed, the knights and guards who’s been tortured, several servants, mercenaries she’d hired, soldiers who’d fought in her defense. Morgause. Agravaine. Lancelot, twice. Most of these had been innocent; their only crime was being in the way of her armies or desire to hurt her brother._

_All these images forced her to face the darkest parts of herself. She hadn’t felt any remorse or regret at causing all that pain, but now that her conscience had woken up, feelings came rushing at her. Pain for the losses and pains of others. Regret for separating husbands and wives, parents and children, friends, brothers, sisters, lovers. Remorse for all she’d destroyed—whole villages decimated, animals, buildings, livelihoods. Horror at everything she’d done to her family, her friends. When had her anger at Uther extended to hurting anyone and everyone who’d gotten in the way?_

Eventually Morgana woke up. Her face was wet with tears, her head ached, her eyes dry, her throat sore, and her heart hurt. Every evil- yes, _evil_ -thing she’d done had been dragged up from her memory and presented in excruciating detail. The sum of her crimes weighed her down and she didn’t see how she’d ever recover.

**xxxXxxx**

Somehow Morgana had fallen back to sleep, and for once, it was completely dreamless. It was past mid-morning when she finally woke up. But she felt well-rested, with no lingering physical pain. This was pretty surprising, considering, but she was grateful. She went about the rest of her day, thinking now and then about the nightmare—but was it?

The images brought her greatest crimes to the forefront of her mind. And she had felt strong emotional pain, like her long-dormant conscience was reasserting itself. Though she still felt the remorse and regret, she somehow felt a strange peace. Maybe there was forgiveness for her still. But she still had to fight her own demons and win. Only then could she return home and beg for forgiveness.

When night fell, she closed her eyes and reached out with her mind. She didn’t know if it would work, but she focused and called out into the night, asking Aithusa to come to her. She had more than a few questions for him, and he would help her.

Over the next few days, Aithusa came and went when he could. Morgana practiced her mind-speech so that conversation could flow more rapidly between them. He helped her see the light that was spreading through her and how to encourage it. He also helped her figure out the next steps she should take. The first of those would be to talk to Merlin.


	5. Chapter 5

Merlin was _still_ suffering for what he’d been forced to reveal the other day. Since he’d told the King and Queen how he’d felt about Morgana, they wouldn’t leave him alone. But at least Gwen was nice about it—she’d just smile at him in a knowing way. Arthur would randomly ask him things like, “When you’re out picking herbs, pick me some flowers for my chambers. They cheer me up!” He knew Arthur would eventually find something else to tease him about, so he semi-patiently endured it. Although, he’d only told them part of the truth. His feelings for her _hadn’t_ gone away, just changed a bit.

At the end of the day, he was very glad to get away from His Royal High and Mightiness and get some rest. Unfortunately, he didn’t get as much as he thought he’d needed. An incessant tapping at his window woke him up before it was light. He didn’t get out of bed until he heard a familiar, “ _Merlin Merlin Merlin!_ ” in his head.

“ _Is that Aithusa at my window?_ ” he asked the little dragon.

“ _Yes!_ ” Aithusa replied.

“ _Aithusa, is everything all right?_ ”

“ _I need you to come to the clearing, to talk to me_.”

“ _Aithusa, we’re talking now. Why do I need to go to the clearing?_ ”

“ _Because . . .  because! There’s something there you have to see_.”

The little dragon was hiding something, Merlin was sure of it. “ _Fine. But I can’t stay long. I have responsibilities here_.”

“ _That is okay. But you may change your mind_.”

Merlin felt the link break after that and heard Aithusa fly away. He grumbled quietly, but got up and dressed. His sneaking out of the castle had become much better, so he had no trouble getting out of the citadel. He really should talk to Arthur about his lax guards someday, but for now they worked in his favor.

It didn’t take him very long to hike to the clearing. To his surprise, Kilgharrah wasn’t there. Just Aithusa, and he was near the woods on the other side of the clearing. “Aithusa!” he called out.

His little dragon hopped up and flew over to him. “ _Merlin. You might get mad at the_ something _, but please don’t hurt her. She doesn’t want to hurt you, only talk._ Please _listen_.”

_Her_? “Aithusa, what—” he cut himself off when he saw Morgana step out of the trees where Aithusa had been. He immediately took up a defensive posture. “What’s going on here, Aithusa?!” he spat.

Morgana walked into the center of the clearing, still several yards away. Her hands were in the air in a gesture of surrender. “Please Merlin, I just want to talk. _Really_.”

Merlin’s head was whirling. Too many emotions swirled through it—relief, frustration, pain, guilt, regret, and that pesky _love_. He tried not to let any of these show on his face. “ _Aithusa, we_ will _talk later_ ,” he thought to the little dragon.

Aithusa shrunk a little bit, but didn’t look afraid, just ashamed. “ _Please listen Merlin_. Please.”

“ _Will it help if I talk like this too?_ ” Morgana thought to Merlin.

He whipped his head around to look at her in shock. “You taught her mind speech?” he asked Aithusa.

“ _She is magic, too_ ,” the little dragon explained.

Merlin wanted to smack his own face. “Ugh! How much did you tell her anyway?”

“I’m right here,” Morgana said. She thought for a moment. “If it makes you feel better, you can bind my magic.”

Merlin’s mouth fell open. “What? You know I can’t . . .”

“Oh give up the act, Merlin. I know about your magic. If you give me the chance, I’ll tell you how.”

“Fine. _Hæfte eallne þæs drycræftes hire sawle!_ Okay, now try to hurt me.”

“ _Hleap on bæc!_ ” she yelled. Her eyes flashed but nothing happened. “Satisfied?” she asked sarcastically. He’d probably been the one to bind her magic when they’d had that confrontation in the throne room.

“Yes. Now, what are you doing here? And how do you know Aithusa?”

“The first time I saw Aithusa was in the woods after I fought Gwen. I was dying and he did something that saved me.”

“Is that true Aithusa? And why her?”

_“I found her dying. I didn’t know who she was; just that she was hurt and had a spark of goodness in her. So I saved her. I put good thoughts into her mind to help her choose better_ ,” Aithusa thought to both of them.

“Can you explain?” he asked Morgana.

“As he healed me, I saw images in my mind. You were hatching Aithusa. I felt such warmth, peace and love. It was beautiful, by the way.”

“Thanks.” _Wait, thanks?_ “What did you do after that?”

“I watched him fly away. I felt fine . . . better than fine. I walked back to my hovel and got some things from there, then destroyed it. I was determined to start anew, and plan another attack on Camelot. But then, I saw other things.

“I started having dreams. Well, not dreams really, but memories that came as dreams. _With my bracelet on_. They were Aithusa’s memories. We think he sent actual memories over to me besides those he meant to send. And because I’m also a seer, I got to experience them. I watched things from his perspective.”

Merlin was puzzled but also intrigued. “I’ve never heard of anything like this. I’ve felt dragon’s breath, but it didn’t heal. And I definitely had no dreams from it. What kinds of things did you see?”

“Well, I saw how you hatched him and heard everything Kilgharrah said. I know he’s Aithusa’s mentor, your dragon and that you are their dragonlord.”

“That’s another secret gone.”

“Oh, I know them all now. The next memory was of a dream Aithusa had. You, Arthur and a few knights were riding through the Valley of the Fallen Kings and got ambushed by my men. Sorry about that, by the way.”

Morgana was apologizing to him? “Go on.”

“Aithusa kept trying to warn, well, _you_ I guess, _Emrys_. And ‘the Once and Future King.’ I read through some of the things Morgause left me and discovered that this King is Arthur.”

Ouch, that was his last secret.

“I woke briefly then went back to sleep. You were playing with Aithusa and gave him a ball. At the same time, you were talking to Kilgharrah. You mentioned how you’d been beat up and Kilgharrah tried to convince you to kill the person. I wasn’t sure then that you were Emrys and were talking about me, but I suspected enough to research. After that, Aithusa visited me for the first time.”

“You did, Aithusa?” Merlin asked the little dragon.

“ _Yes. I wanted to see how she was, if the little goodness in her had grown. It had_.”

“We talked. That night I dreamed another memory. You played more with Aithusa and discussed Gaius’s kidnapping with Kilgharrah. I regret that too.” She looked away for a moment, ashamed of her desperate actions and the pain it had caused Merlin and his mentor.

Merlin wanted to reach out to her, to comfort her, but refrained. He was softening toward her, but not enough to trust her yet. “I remember that. He reminded me that being Emrys was important even if I didn’t want to be important. I _still_ don’t want to be important.”

“Ah, yes. Your destiny. Well, by then I had a pretty good idea of what your destiny was. After that dream, I didn’t go back to sleep, but I meditated. And I had a vision. I saw various scenes. In the first, I was at the Isle of the Blessed, after I’d released the Dorocha.  The Cailleach told me that Emrys would walk in my shadow and be my destiny and my doom.”

“I’ve never heard that before. But the Cailleach visited me, too.  She just repeated my name. No words of doom.”

“After that, I saw you talking to Kilgharrah. You mentioned how you’d thought we were the same. He told you that trust is a double-edged sword and that I’m the darkness to your light . . .”

“And the hatred to my love, yes. That was after he’d saved me from the serkets who’d wanted me for dinner.”

“I regret that too. But then my vision shifted to one I’d been having for about a year now. You, as Emrys, appeared to me on a battlefield. Dead men were all around us and you said, ‘Is this really what you wanted, Morgana?’  I begged for your help. Usually that dream ended there, but it went on this time. You changed the scene and we were young and looking over Camelot. You told me I had a choice and . . .”

“Wait,” he interrupted again. “I had a similar dream a few nights ago. Before Gwen’s coronation. I told you that you could choose your old way and cause destruction, or a new way and experience love. Right?”

Morgana’s mouth hung open this time. “Y-yes. That’s . . . incredible. We had the same dream at the same time. What are the odds?”

“Maybe our destinies really are intertwined,” Merlin mused. “That’s . . .”

“Another thing Kilgharrah told you.  Aithusa told me that ‘doom’ can mean something besides my death.”

He nodded. “That could be right. Destiny, dreams and dragons are rarely clear.”

That prompted Aithusa to indignantly say, “ _Hey!_ ”

“Oh, I was mostly talking about Kilgharrah anyway. Come here, you,” Merlin told the dragon. Morgana watched Aithusa jump into Merlin’s arms and snuggle into the warlock’s chest. The mutual affection there was tangible; her heart ached for it. Merlin looked back up at her, “I’m guessing you’re not done yet.”

She shook her head. “Not yet. I later found the crystal Morgause used to scry with. I, um, saw you talking with Arthur and Gwen. They were teasing you about girls?”

Merlin blushed. _Not that conversation!_ “Um, yes. I, um, don’t want to talk about it.”

“But you said that you’d liked me. Is that why you told Kilgharrah you couldn’t kill me?” She took a step closer to him, but stopped when he looked apprehensive.

“Um, do I have to answer that?”

She took pity on him. “Not right now. But I’ll have it out of you later.” She gave him a wicked smile.

“O-kay. Anything else?”

“I had another dream later. I kept seeing opposing scenes. Like I saw Gwen holding a baby while I hugged her. Then it changed to me throwing her into a darkened room. Good and bad, like one would happen if I chose good or the other would happen if I chose evil. Aithusa came after that and helped me figure it out. He told me more about you. We eventually decided that the next step was to talk to you. You see, I’ve made my choice.”

Aithusa jumped up and down for a minute before launching himself into the air for joyful acrobatics. Merlin laughed and said, “Someone’s happy. So, what is it?”

“I want peace. I don’t want to fight anymore. I want to come back to Camelot and beg forgiveness. Apologize. Throw myself on Arthur’s mercy. And if he lets me live, I’d like to learn how to use my magic for good. I’ve seen that you’d be a good teacher for that.”

“Will you forgive me too? I-I’d understand if you didn’t.”

Morgana gave him an appraising look and said, “I’ll work on it. But you owe me some answers.”

“Of course.” He looked up at the sun’s position. “Oh _no_. I’m late. He’s going to put me in the stocks—or _worse_ , mucking out the stables. I’m sorry Morgana, I have to go.”

“Can you ask Arthur- hypothetically -how he’d feel about me coming back? And unbind my magic?”

“Yeah, I’ll get you a message back somehow.” He muttered a few words and she felt her magic moving within her again. “Bye Aithusa!” Merlin started running back to the castle at a brisk pace.

“I don’t think I’ll ever understand him,” Morgana commented to the dragon.

“ _But now you have plenty of time to try_ ,” Aithusa said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’ll see.” Aithusa giggled and flew away, back to get some sleep.

**xxxXxxx**

When Merlin reached Arthur and Gwen’s chambers, Arthur was dressed and sitting at his desk. Gwen, sadly, was nowhere to be found, which mean she couldn’t soften whatever punishment the King came up with. “You’re late,” Arthur pointed out.

“Yes, I’m sorry. I was out picking herbs for Gaius.”

“Of course.”

He opened his mouth again to continue, but Merlin cut him off. “Before you send me to muck out the stables, can I ask you a question?”

“You just did.” The King smirked.

“Ha ha.”

“What is it?”

“Do you ever miss Morgana?”

Arthur looked stunned for a moment. “I . . . of course I do.”

“Even after everything she’s done?”

“Merlin, she’s my sister. Wouldn’t you still love your sister after all that?”

“I would.” He cleared his throat. “How would you feel if she came back, wanting forgiveness?”

Arthur’s mouth fell open, then closed. “Um, wow. I . . . I guess it would depend on if it was genuine or not. She’s hurt a lot of people and has broken the laws of Camelot. She’d have to be accountable for that.”

“That’s true enough.”

“Out of curiosity, why do you ask?”

“I was just curious to see what you thought.”

“Riiiight.” Arthur raised an eyebrow. “Well, now that's out of the way, the stables await.”

Merlin sighed. “Yes, sire.”

**xxxXxxx**

Night had just fallen when Aithusa heard the call. Merlin was summoning him, not Kilgharrah. “ _Kilgharrah_ ,” he addressed the older dragon.

“ _I felt it, but did not hear it. The young warlock wishes to speak only to you_ ,” Kilgharrah replied.

“ _Are you coming?_ ” Aithusa asked.

“ _Go, Young One. I will see you back at the cave_.”

“ _Until then_.” Aithusa changed the angle of his flight toward Camelot. He wondered what Merlin could possibly want with just him, if it had to do with Morgana.

In very little time, he landed at the clearing where they usually met Merlin. He was standing there alone, waiting. When he saw Aithusa, he smiled broadly. “Aithusa!”

“Merlin!” He hopped up to Merlin's shoulder and rubbed his head against his lord's. “ _What is it you need?_ ”

“I would like to speak to Morgana again, if you can arrange it for me.”

“Yes yes yes!” He chirped. “ _But there must be an easier way. Can you teleport yourself?_ ”

“Teleport?”

“ _Magically move from place to place_.”

“I-uh, no.”

“ _Morgana can teach you. Then you can go to her castle to talk. Easy!_ ”

“That sounds good. Can you ask her to come here tomorrow night?”

“ _Yes! I will talk to her tonight. I will go now, unless, something else?_ ”

“Tell her that I think Arthur will forgive her.”

“ _Yes, I will tell her_.” He flapped his wings then butted his head into Merlin's again. “Love you!”

“Love you too! Have a good night.”

The little dragon took off and flew high into the air. He bent his wings toward Morgana's castle and soon came upon it. She wasn't outside, so he flew into the entrance and began looking for her again. She was in the room with the dusty scrolls, reading. “Morgana!”

“You spoke out loud!”

“ _I can, a little_.”

“What else can you say out loud?”

“Love you, Merlin.”

“That figures. Is that it?”

“Yes!”

“Oh very good. So what have you to tell me?”

“ _Merlin would like to speak to you tomorrow night. In the clearing_.”

“There has to be a better way to communicate.”

“ _There is! Teach him to teleport. He can come here to talk whenever he wants_.”

“He doesn't know how?”

Aithusa made a little choking sound that sounded like it could be a giggle. “ _No. There is much he doesn't know. Much you can teach. Much he can teach you_.”

“I'm sure.”

Should he tell her what he'd seen about their future? That their paths lay together in more ways than one? No, probably not. Some things were better left to be discovered on their own. “ _Will you meet with him?_ ”

“Of course.”

“ _Good. He has many things to tell you, like the King would probably forgive you! He’ll explain more._ ”

“Am I crazy to think I could actually go home?”

“ _What is ‘crazy’?_ ”

“Foolish. Silly. Stupid. Weird.”

“ _You are none of those things, Morgana. It is natural to want to be with family and friends_.”

“Thank you, Aithusa. You’ve set my mind at ease.”

“ _You’re welcome_.” He cocked his head, as if listening. “ _Oh dear_.”

“What is it?”

“ _Kilgarrah calls for me. I need to go_.”

“Oh, okay. Will I see you tomorrow night?”

“Maybe.” He began hopping. “Bye, Morgana.”

Aithusa took off and made his way out of the castle and toward Kilgharrah. It had been a good night so far, and if he got to hunt more, it would be even better.


	6. Chapter 6

Morgana woke with a strange sense of excitement. It took her a moment to pinpoint why, but then it hit her like a bolt—she was going to see Merlin tonight. Who would have ever thought she’d be excited to see the man who’d betrayed her and tried to kill her numerous times? But there it was. She really was changing and it felt wonderful. And different, but she somehow knew it was the right thing to do.

She did several things to keep herself busy throughout the day, like checking on her vegetables, reading and cleaning out some of the other rooms. It was lonely to be in this castle by herself and she found herself wishing Aithusa would show up to distract her.

Finally moonrise arrived and she tidied herself in preparation for meeting with Merlin. It really was odd how often he came to her mind. She shook it off and pronounced the spell to transport herself to the clearing near Camelot. “ _Bedyrne mé. Astýre mé þanonweard_.” A vortex rose up around her and obscured her vision for a few moments, but when it cleared away, she was in the clearing. There was no sign of Merlin yet, but the night was still young.

She sat down on a boulder at the edge of the clearing to wait. She amused herself by practicing various spells on items around her, making the grass grow flowers and rocks stack themselves atop each other. Finally, after about an hour, she heard footsteps treading through the woods and Merlin appeared not too far away from her. “Hello,” he said, and began walking toward her.

Morgana got up and met him. “Thanks for sending Aithusa to me. I was so glad to hear about what Arthur said.”

“You’re welcome. I thought you’d like to hear it.”

“It made my day.” She slapped her hands. “So, you want to learn teleportation.”

“Yeah. I mean, it’s not in my spellbook.”

“Well that’s a crying shame.”

“Tell me about it. So what do I have to do?”

“Picture in your mind where you want to be then say the words. For one person it’s ‘Bedyrne mé. Astýre mé þanonweard.’”

He repeated the words a few times. “Okay, so I should start small, right?”

“Yeah, you should maybe try for the other side of the clearing.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then he opened his eyes and said with determination, “ _Bedyrne mé. Astýre mé þanonweard_.” Nothing happened, not even a slight breeze.

“That’s okay. It took me more than one try to get it too.”

He frowned but steeled himself again. “ _Bedyrne mé. Astýre mé þanonweard_.” This time a vortex of air and dirt swirled around him. He vanished and reappeared on the other side of the clearing. “Ha! I did it!” He called.

She frowned. Of course _Emrys_ would get it faster than she had. “Come back,” she yelled over to him.

She heard him repeat the spell and soon the vortex appeared at her side again. When it cleared up, Merlin stood there grinning. “Not easy but dead useful.”

“I imagine it would be, for you.”

“Sorry,” he said, not sounding very apologetic. “So, are we going to your lair now?”

She frowned again. “It’s not a lair. It’s a small keep.”

“Okay.”

“Yes we’re going now. But I have to direct us since you’ve no idea where it is.”

“That’s fine.”

“Take my hand.” He paused a moment but took her hand. A feeling of warmth worked its way up her arm and into her chest. _What was that?_ “Okay, for two or more people, it works like this—”

“Using ‘ús’ instead of ‘mé’?”

“Yes, so now I’ll say it. _Bedyrne ús. Astýre ús þanonweard_.”

As the vortex rose around the both of them, he gripped her hand tighter. She had no time to muse on this as the clearing disappeared around them and they appeared outside the entrance of the small keep.

He let go of her hand and looked all around him. “I think I have been here before.” He indicated the archway. “Let’s go inside.”

She led him up the stairs into the tiny courtyard. “This is one of the places Morgause brought me after you poisoned me.”

“Something I deeply regret,” he replied, looking around again. “I’m sure I’ve been here before.”

“When would you have come here?” She asked as she led them up into the keep.

“Do you remember when Morgause showed up out of nowhere and challenged Arthur to a duel?”

“Yeah.” She led him toward the library.

“Afterward, she promised to spare him if he’d come to her. So she enchanted his horse to lead him- us -here.”

She nodded. “Oh. She told me something about that. She brought his mother’s spirit to life briefly.”

“Yes. And that spirit told Arthur the truth about his birth—that the magic that used to conceive him resulted in his mother’s death.”

“That explains why he was upset for a few days after that.”

He folded his arms. “Yes. I had to lie to stop him from killing Uther.”

“Did it occur to you—?”

“That I would have been better off if I’d let him kill his father? Oh yeah. But he wasn’t ready to rule. And if he’d killed his father, the regret would have tainted the rest of his reign.”

“Ah. I see. Still though . . .”

“I know, I know.” They’d arrived at the library. She showed him in and they sat across from each other at the table Morgana used to study. “So . . .?” He started.

“I have plenty of questions for you, and you’re going to answer them for me.”

He opened his arms wide. “Of course. You know all my secrets anyway. I’m an open book.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about your magic after mine had manifested? You could have helped so much!”

“Oh, you had to pick the hardest one.” He cleared his throat. “Morgana, you should know I wanted to tell you _so much_! But I was warned by Kilgharrah and Gaius not to tell you. It was so hard to keep quiet that night you came to Gaius’s chambers, scared out of your mind.”

“So you knew.”

“Of course I knew! The glass that broke from your window fell on the outside of the keep. That could only have happened if the explosion had come from the inside. I tried to tell Gaius, but he told me to keep it to myself . . . but we both knew what it meant.”

She crossed her arms. “But why did you keep your magic a secret from me?”

“The dragon . . . he told me your destiny was to unite with the druid boy in evil. And he wasn’t exactly wrong, was he?”

“You . . . but if you’d told me, maybe I wouldn’t have gone to Morgause and followed her.”

“Maybe. But Gaius told me it was safest to keep the knowledge secret. The one time he agreed with the dragon.” He reached out and took her hand. “I’m so sorry, Morgana. If I’d told you, you wouldn’t be so confused now. You wouldn’t have gone through all you’ve had to. It’s my biggest regret.” He sighed and let go of her hand.

She immediately reached for and took his hand again. “I-I understand. I may not like it, but now I understand. Thank you for telling me.”

“Of course. It’s the least I could do.” He smiled.

She smiled back at him. “All right, about the poisoning . . .”

“Didn’t Morgause explain that to you?”

“No. Before the sickness I met her in the woods and she asked if I wanted Uther’s downfall. I did, of course, then the world went dark. I woke up in my bed the next morning with no memory of what had happened next.”

He rolled his eyes. “That woman . . . well, what happened was she anchored the spell causing the sleeping sickness, to you.”

“That’s why you kept asking me what I knew . . . I had no idea she was going to do that! She didn’t care about anyone else in Camelot! I only wanted _Uther_ gone, not everyone . . .”

“Ah, that’s how she did it,” he replied sadly. “She used you and lied to you for her own means.”

She shook her head. “If I’d only known . . .”

“I know that feeling well.”

“So you poisoned me . . .”

“Because Kilgharrah told me all this. The only way to end the spell was to kill you.” His hand tightened around hers. “Morgana, you must know . . . I didn’t want to do it! But I had a duty to save Arthur and Camelot or save you, and I think you know which one won.”

She looked into his eyes. They were filled with tears—he wasn’t lying. “Oh Merlin, if only . . .”

“The lament of all survivors. I thought you’d joined Morgause in evil. If only I’d known . . . I’m so sorry.”

They both sighed.

“Any other questions?” he asked.

She smiled slowly. “So you’re a dragonlord huh? How did that happen?”

He looked down. “My father died.”

She squeezed his hand. “I’m so sorry. But how did that make you a dragonlord?”

“When a dragonlord dies, the power is passed from father to son.”

“I thought you didn’t know your father?”

“I didn’t know him up until the time Kilgharrah attacked Camelot. But he only attacked because I released him in the first place.”

Her mouth fell open. “You did that? I heard about that whole thing from Morgause. She thought it was wonderful, a magical being getting revenge.”

“He was only getting revenge because Uther had imprisoned him for over twenty years.”

“So the rumors were true.”

“Absolutely. I used to go talk to him sometimes when he was still imprisoned. But as a result of . . . several things, I’d made a deal to free him, and after you left, he finally called me on it. I’m responsible for all that damage, all those deaths . . .” He looked down.

“Merlin, you were only doing what you had to do, right?”

“Yeah. He would have taken my mother’s life if I hadn’t.”

She shook her head. “Oh, Merlin . . .”

“Stupid deal, I know.”

“So to stop the dragon, someone suggested a dragonlord? I thought they were all dead.”

“Gaius did. And he helped one escape—to Ealdor. I’m sure you can see where this is going.”

“He met your mother.”

“Yes. And here I am.”

“So Gaius suggested you find him?”

“Yeah. So of course Arthur and I went looking for him and found him. He didn’t want to help at first, but he came round.” He sighed.

“How did he die?”

“Bandits attacked us on our way to Camelot. He took a sword for me . . .” His eyes filled with tears again.

She reached out and took his other hand too. “Oh Merlin.”

“I’m okay. It’s just then I received my powers. I told Kilgharrah to never attack Camelot again and so far he hasn’t. I doubt he ever will, now.”

“That’s an incredible story.”

“Thanks.” He pulled a hand free and wiped at his eyes. “I’d better go. It’s getting awfully late.”

They both stood. “Of course,” she replied, “but I’m nowhere near done with you.”

He smiled slowly. “Oh really?”

She smiled back. “You! I meant I still have questions.”

“Of course you do.”

“Will you come back here?”

“Yes. But not tomorrow night. I’m going to need to catch up on my sleep.”

“Naturally.”

“Hey!”

She impulsively moved forward and embraced him. “Come back soon. I get so lonely here.”

When she backed away, he looked surprised. “Oh. Okay. How about two nights from now?”

“That works. Thank you for coming.”

“You’re welcome. I-I had a good time.”

“Me too.”

He smiled again. “Hey, do you think I could transport directly to my room from here?”

“I don’t see why not. I haven’t found a limit to the spell’s range yet.”

“Interesting. I’ll try it—goodbye Morgana.”

“Goodbye Merlin.”

He nodded to her then spoke, “ _Bedyrne mé. Astýre mé þanonweard_.” Just before the vortex took him, she saw his hand wave at her but before she could reply, he was gone.

**xxxXxxx**

After another night of rest and a day of work, Merlin hiked to the clearing after moonrise. He pictured Morgana’s keep in his mind and said the words to transport himself there. After that rush of wind- it was really quite amazing -the keep appeared in front of him. Morgana stood at the archway leading to its interior and he made his way to her. “Good evening,” he told her.

She smiled back at him, and in that smile he saw the old Morgana—the one who’d stood up for the weak and cared for the downtrodden. “Hello,” she replied.

“So what are we going to talk about tonight?”

“I thought I’d show you the rest of the keep and fire questions at you as we walk.”

“Seems fair.”

She showed him around the rooms of the keep, including her bedroom and the kitchen. They ended up in the room with the scrying crystal, which fascinated Merlin. “Can you make it work for me?”

She looked up at him, a little surprised. “I suppose. Don’t you scry?”

“I don’t know how,” he confessed. “I’m not a seer. I don’t even know if it would work for me.”

“It’s a simple spell. There’s no reason you can’t make it work. Here, I’ll try it then you can give it a go. _Ætíe mé þá þé ic séce_. Guinevere.”

They stared into the crystal. A dark cloud appeared in its center, which resolved into a picture of Gwen and Arthur sleeping in their bed. Morgana held the vision there for a few moments then whispered, “ _Ende_. Now you try. All you have to do its say ‘Ætíe mé þá þé ic séce’ then the name of the person you want to see.”

Merlin repeated the words of the spell a couple of times, just to be sure he pronounced them right then prepared himself to say it to the crystal. “ _Ætíe mé þá þé ic séce_. Gaius.” The same cloud appeared followed by an image of Gaius resting in his bed. They watched him for a moment before Merlin said “ _Ende_. Wow.”

“I know. I can see anyone, anywhere, except beyond the veil, of course.” She smiled impishly before continuing, “It’s where I saw you talking with Arthur and Gwen about how you liked me.”

“Oh, yeah.” He avoided looking into her eyes.

A little hurt, she reached out to touch his shoulder. “What’s wrong? Are you ashamed you liked me?”

He looked back up at her. “No. It’s just . . . you were evil and I didn’t want to like you. But I didn’t want to hurt you either.”

“And why is that?” She moved a little closer.

“Maybe because I’d hoped there was still good in you.”

“Haven’t I proven that there is?”

Her jade-green eyes drew him in. “I think you have.” He took her hand and a shiver ran through him at the contact. “Aithusa’s a pretty good judge of character.”

“So do you still like me?”

“I-I . . .”

“Having trouble with your words, are you?” She stepped closer again, licking her lips.

He was beginning to feel a little dizzy. “You want the truth?”

“Well, lies got us nothing, didn’t they?”

“True. All right. I never stopped liking you and it held me back. But I’m glad it did. Seeing you like this . . . good again . . . it’s nice. It’s more than nice.”

“Really?” She smirked.

“Oh no, don’t smirk.” He didn’t know whether to step back, or . . .

She laughed. “Would you prefer this then?” She leaned into him and quickly brushed her lips across his.

He started, looking at her with wide eyes. “What—?”

“Maybe I don’t hate you anymore either.”

“I never hated you. I hated what you’d done,” he said gently.

“Oh?”

“It’s the reason I never killed you even though I could have.”

“Ha.”

“Morgana, I’ve liked you since I first saw you in Camelot. You were beautiful on the outside _and_ the inside. I can see it returning.” He thought for a moment, leaning toward her. “Maybe I should ask you how you feel about me. You did just kiss me.”

She flushed for a moment. “That? That was friendly banter.”

“It didn’t feel very friend-like.”

“Oh, you!” Flustered, she tugged at his hand. “Come on. Let’s go to the library. I’ll show you more prophecies about you.”

He followed her to the library and even though he could have pulled his hand from hers, he didn’t. He let her lead him to the room she’d taken him to the first time he’d visited. Although, instead of sitting across from her at the table, he sat next to her after she brought out all the scrolls she’d discovered with “Emrys” on them and showed him the prophecies. He marveled that seers from ages ago had seen him and Arthur, even knowing details about their personal lives. “They knew more about me than I do,” he marveled.

After several scrolls, he yawned hugely and apologized. “It must be getting late. I’d better go.” He stood and she followed suit.

“Will you come again?”

“Of course! How am I supposed to convince Arthur you’re good if I don’t witness it myself?”

She laughed. “True.”

“So I will see you again in another two nights, all right?”

“Okay.”

This time he initiated the hug then stepped back from her to say the spell. He incanted it then was gone in a swirl of wind. She sighed and went back to her bedroom. But she didn’t go to sleep right away—thoughts kept swirling in her mind.

Why _had_ she kissed him? Was she losing her mind? Or had she just softened that much? She did notice that Merlin hadn’t backed away or responded with disgust. Did that mean he’d welcome more of that kind of attention? He admitted that he still liked her and she was feeling . . . pretty fond of him too. So what did that mean? She wasn’t sure but she definitely wanted to find out.


	7. Chapter 7

Near the end of the next day, Merlin found himself in the King and Queen’s chambers with Arthur. He was polishing Arthur’s favorite sword- besides Excalibur -while the King sat at his desk. Arthur didn’t look particularly engaged in his reading, so Merlin thought it might be a good time to bring up Morgana again.

“Arthur?”

He looked up. “Hmm?”

“Could I ask you something . . . about Morgana?”

“Her again, hm? Are we going to discuss your feelings for her again?”

Merlin flushed slightly. “No.”

Arthur sighed as if disappointed. “All right. What about her?”

“How would you feel if she showed up tomorrow and threw herself on your mercy? If she’d changed, become good again?”

“Didn’t you ask something like this a few days ago?” He put down the parchment.

“Yeah, but I really want to know.”

“Why?”

Merlin crossed his arms. “Just in case I run into her sometime and she claims she’s repented.”

Arthur frowned at his servant. “That’s kind of specific . . . why do I think you’ve already run into her?”

“Me? What? No.”

“You know, Merlin, you’re a really horrible liar.”

Merlin flushed again. “No, not me. I don’t lie.”

“You’re lying.” Merlin sighed as Arthur continued to speak. “Let me guess: you were out picking herbs one morning and Morgana approached you. She claimed to be sorry for everything she’d done and wants to return to Camelot. Am I close?”

“More than you know.”

“And she wanted you to see how I felt about it. Well I don’t know how I feel about it. How can you—how can I know if she’s telling the truth? It could be just a ploy to take over Camelot again.”

“I’ve already thought of that. She seemed genuine in her desire to make peace.”

“But how do you _know_?” Arthur sighed. “Look, Merlin, even if she’s telling the truth, and I’d love to believe that, others wouldn’t be so sanguine. She hurt a lot of people in her mad quest for power and they’ll want her punished. And they’re not wrong—she has to pay for what she did.”

“I know. She’s prepared to do that.”

“Even if it means her death? Because execution is more likely than not. She’s committed treason over and over.”

“I think she’s prepared for that eventuality, yes. She’s changed, Arthur. For real. And if she’s not telling the truth, there are ways to stop her.” Arthur shot him a quizzical look. “Gaius will know them.”

“You’re sure about her?”

“Absolutely.”

“And Gaius can make a potion or whatever for insurance?”

“Definitely.” He grinned.

“All right. The next time you ‘run into her,’ tell her I’ll see her. But also tell her these conditions—she’ll have to face a trial and consent to not use her magic. If need be we’ll use whatever Gaius comes up with. She has to agree to those or I won’t see her.”

“I understand. And I know she will too.”

“Good. Now, if you’re done with the questions, we both have work to finish.” He picked up the parchment.

“Of course.”

Both men got back to their work. When Merlin finished with the sword, he asked to be excused so he could go talk to Gaius. Arthur agreed and let him go for the night. Merlin wasted no time in getting back to Gaius’s chambers. When he got there, he found the old physician reading through one of his books.

“Gaius,” Merlin said.

The other man looked up. “Oh, Merlin. You missed dinner, but here it is, waiting for you.”

“Thank you, Gaius.” Merlin sat and began eating the cold chicken and vegetables. He thought about how he was going to let Gaius know he’d been talking to Morgana and how she wanted to come back. Gaius had been seriously hurt in her last grab for power and would most likely be against the idea. Merlin probably had to prove he could contain Morgana in addition to convincing Gaius of her sincerity. Piece of cake, right? Not so much.

Merlin finished his dinner quickly then got to work. “Gaius, can I ask you something?”

The old physician looked up at Merlin and closed his book. “What is it?”

“How would you feel if Morgana came back to Camelot?”

Gaius’s face went white. He’d only just recovered from his time spent in the dungeon. “I-I . . .”

“I understand. I’d feel much the same way if I hadn’t been talking to her.”

The pinched look on Gaius’s face didn’t clear away. “You’ve been . . . you’ve been _talking_ to her? How? Why? Merlin—”

“Before you lecture me, because I know you want to, here’s how it happened. Aithusa woke me up a few nights ago and asked me to go to the clearing. When I got there, Morgana was there. She and Aithusa had been talking.”

“How does that make it all right?”

“Hang on, I’m not done yet. Aithusa saved her life after she escaped Camelot. He said he saw some good in her and wanted to save her, to encourage that good. She started dreaming Aithusa’s memories and discovered all my secrets. She decided that she wanted to come back to Camelot, to repair the mistakes she made.”

“You believed her?”

“Gaius, dragons are fairly good judges of character. If Aithusa believes her then I do. So I’ve been talking with her, to find out for myself. And Gaius—I believe her.”

Gaius breathed out a bit unsteadily. “Merlin, if that’s true . . . Arthur would have to know.”

“He knows most of the story. The relevant bits anyway, not about my magic. He’s agreed to let her come, but she has to agree to a trial and to not use magic. I’ve agreed to make sure this happens.”

“How will you do that?”

“I told him you’d make up something that could suppress her magic, if necessary.”

“I don’t know of anything . . .”

“Relax, Gaius. I know a spell. If you make a generic potion that does nothing, I can either say the spell over it to make it do that or just say it over her quietly. It’ll stay suppressed for as long as I wish it.”

Gaius shook his head slowly. “You’re sure about her?”

“Gaius, I’d stake my life on it.”

“You may have to do just that.”

“I’m hoping she’ll stay true to her word so I don’t have to. This will work, Gaius.”

“All right, Merlin. I trust you. I don’t know why sometimes, but I do.”

Merlin grinned. “Thanks, Gaius. I’ll tell her tomorrow night. She’ll be so excited!”

“For now, we’d better go to bed.”

“I couldn’t agree more, Gaius.” He yawned and helped the older man tidy up the chambers. “Goodnight,” he said before stepping up to his room.

**xxxXxxx**

Somehow Morgana made it through her day without getting lost in thoughts of Merlin—too many times. How she’d come to care so much about him so quickly she didn’t know. It didn’t seem like her visions could have worked on her like this, but apparently they had. But now it approached sunset and she hoped he’d come tonight. He hadn’t said he would, but she hoped.

Shortly after sunset she was pacing anxiously in the courtyard. Would he or wouldn’t he? Soon after she’d thought that, she heard the peculiar whooshing sound the teleportation spell made and Merlin stepped inside the archway. “Hello,” he said.

She walked quickly toward him and threw her arms around him. “It’s so good to see you,” she said. He looked a little surprised when she pulled away.

“Likewise,” he replied, taking her hand. “I have so much to tell you.”

“Let’s talk inside.” She pulled him up the stairs into the castle and turned into the library again. Instead of sitting at the table, she brought him to two chairs facing each other and sat in one. He sat in the other. “What is it?”

“I talked to Arthur again . . .”

“Uh oh.”

“No, it’s good. I managed to convince him you’re telling the truth about wanting forgiveness.”

“I’ll bet that wasn’t easy.”

“Not even slightly. But he came around eventually and will allow you back into Camelot.”

“Really?” She felt like bouncing out of her chair but managed to stay in it.

“Yes, but there are conditions.”

“Of course.”

“One is you have to agree to not use your magic at all. I’ve taken on the responsibility to make sure you hold to that.”

“How’s that?”

“If you don’t agree, I’ll bind your magic. Gaius is preparing a potion that should do that, once I enchant it.”

“Oh. Of course I’ll agree. You may want to give me the potion anyway, it may ease others’ minds.”

“That’s exactly Arthur’s point.”

“And the other condition?”

“You’ll have to undergo a trial and accept punishment for your crimes. He wanted to make sure you knew the punishment may include execution.”

She swallowed with difficulty. “I . . . see. I can accept that as long as everyone knows I accept responsibility for my crimes.”

“Should the need arise, I’ll make sure they will. But I don’t think Arthur will execute you.”

“Why not?”

“You’re his sister and he still cares about you. I think he’ll do everything in his power to keep execution off the table.”

She took both his hands. “Thank you, Merlin,”

“Don’t thank me. I don’t have the power here.”

“Oh, but you do. Don’t you see the influence you’ve had on him over the years? I don’t think he’d be nearly so fair-minded without you around. You’ve helped bring out the best in him—I noticed that even before I left Camelot the first time.”

“He would have grown up eventually.”

“But not nearly so well. He listens to you and respects you.”

“You’re too kind.”

She reached out and touched his face. His blue eyes looked straight into her green ones. “No, you are. Without your example and love for Aithusa, I wouldn’t be where I am now.”

“Thank you. I’m glad Aithusa gave you a chance. He really is a good judge of character.”

She moved a bit close to Merlin, keeping her hand on his face. “He definitely is.”

They looked into each other’s eyes for a moment before the air in the room changed and he asked, “Morgana, can I—?”

“—yes,” she replied before he could finish. They both leaned forward slightly to press their lips together. Morgana shivered at the contact, and paradoxically, warmth flooded her body. He seemed to feel it too and pressed himself a little closer. As the kiss deepened, she wanted to be closer still, so she stood and pulled him up with her.

The kiss broke and he smiled at her briefly before bringing up a hand to tuck a loose lock of hair behind her ear. He continued the motion downward to cup his hand behind her jaw and bring her mouth forward to meet his. She “mm’ed” into the kiss as his hands slid down to hold her waist. Hers drifted up into his hair to hold her head to his. Bliss rolled through both of them as their bodies pressed closer and closer together.

Neither noticed the little white dragon fly into the room and stop short at the sight of their kiss. Aithusa’s wings flapped excitedly as he chirped and whistled at his vision come to life.

Startled, the couple broke from their kiss and took note of the little lizard now perched on the table. They both laughed at his excitement but didn’t let go of each other. Morgana smiled and nodded at Merlin, and he spoke up. “Hello, Aithusa.”

“Merlin! Morgana! _I see you two are getting along well now_ ,” the little dragon said.

Merlin slid an arm around Morgana’s waist and together they approached the dragon. “You little sneak.”

“ _It pleases me to see my two favorite people enjoying one another_.”

Both Merlin and Morgana flushed. “Did you come for a visit?” she asked.

“ _I wanted to see if Merlin’s talked to you. I see he has._ ” Aithusa grinned in a dragonish way, with plenty of teeth.

“Arthur has decided to welcome her back to Camelot. She has to give up magic and undergo a trial for her crimes.”

“ _This is good news!_ ”

“We just have to hope he doesn’t execute me,” Morgana added.

“ _He won’t_.”

“You’re sure?” Merlin asked.

“ _I have seen your futures—and you are both alive_.”

“That’s good to know,” Merlin replied. “Now we can make our plan to get Morgana home.”

“What? I can’t just walk into Camelot?” She smirked.

He gave her a look. “Nooo. You don’t want to be attacked, do you?”

“Of course not. I was only joking.”

“All right. I think I should meet you somewhere just outside Camelot and bring you in. We should probably cover your face too.”

“That sounds prudent.”

“You‘ll need some time to set things in order here, right?”

“Not much really.”

“Well I’ll definitely need some time to get things in order in Camelot. It’s not every day I sneak in an evil witch.”

“Ha ha. How’s three days from this morning? That enough time?”

“It should be.” He thought for a moment. “How about I meet you at the edge of the Darkling Woods in three days? I’ll bring horses.”

“I can do that.” She took a deep breath. “This is so exciting and so terrifying.”

Merlin pulled her closer. “It’ll be all right. Arthur wants you back; I’ll keep you safe.”

“Thank you.” She stretched up to kiss his cheek.

“ _We should probably tell Kilgharrah too_.”

“You’ve got to be joking, Aithusa, he wants to kill Morgana.”

“What are you worried about? You can stop him, right?”

“Yeah, he’s just going to be so mad though. But he deserves to know what we’re doing.”

“All right.”

“We should probably do it right now.”

“Right now?” Morgana started to panic. She wasn’t prepared to face an angry dragon.

“We should do it and get it over with. Bad news doesn’t get easier with time. I’ll be pretty busy after this anyhow.”

“I guess so. But let’s go back to the clearing. I don’t really want him to know where I’m living.”

“That’s a good idea. Are you coming Aithusa?”

“ _Of course. If he reads my mind he’ll be convinced_.”

“Now why didn’t I think of that?” He took Morgana’s hand and led her out of the room and to the castle’s courtyard. He looked down at her. “Ready?”

“No, but let’s do it anyway.”

“Don’t worry, love. He won’t hurt you.” She looked up at him in surprise. “What is it?”

“That’s the first time you’ve called me ‘love.’”

He smiled. “Ah. But you are.”

“I know.” She stood up on her tiptoes to press their lips together. He accepted it gladly and kissed her back before breaking it shortly afterward.

“You know I could do this all night but we’ve got a dragon to meet.”

“Okay.”

They joined hands and Merlin pronounced the spell to take them to the clearing where he usually met Kilgharrah. Once there, Merlin threw his head back and roared to the sky. He looked down at Morgana and saw a peculiar look on her face. “What is it?”

“Is that another language?”

“It’s the language of the dragons. After my father died, it kind of just came to me.”

“It’s incredibly sexy.”

He grinned down at her. “You really think so.”

“Mmm hmm.” She leaned up to give him a quick kiss, but he chased her when she pulled away, They remained pressed together until they heard the flapping of tiny wings. Aithusa appeared and landed on the ground in front of them. Just after he did so, they heard the beating of much larger wings. Merlin took hold of Morgana's hand and turned to face the direction Kilgharrah was approaching in.

“What is she doing here?” The big dragon roared as he sank to the ground.

“You will not harm Morgana!” Merlin roared in the dragon’s language.

Kilgharrah reeled back as if slapped then turned to look at Aithusa. “Do not tell me you had a part in her appearance.”

“ _I did_.”

“What is this treachery?” Kilgharrah growled.

“ _I found her when she was dying and I saved her because I saw a spark of good in her_.”

“You did _what_?”

“ _I saw a spark of good in her. It was there plain to see and now she is all good_.”

“How can this be? Her destiny . . .”

“Was not set in stone,” Merlin interrupted.

Kilgharrah focused on him again. This time he took note of their clasped hands. “You and she . . .”

“Are together now.” He turned to smile at Morgana. “I never stopped loving her, Kilgharrah.”

“This is outrageous,” the big dragon snorted.

“ _If you don’t believe us, search our minds. Search our hearts. You’ll see_.”

“I will.” Kilgharrah closed his eyes and went still. Aithusa found himself being searched mentally. Soon Morgana found Kilgharrah in her head. The dragon looked through her memories as far back as her aborted takeover of Camelot. When he finally withdrew, it was with a sense of satisfaction. “I see.”

“That’s all you have to say?” Merlin said.

“No, that is not all I have to say. But though I disapprove I can no longer see a reason to oppose her. Or your plan to take her to Camelot.”

“You—you don’t?”

“No. All of your claims are true—Aithusa saved her because he saw the good in her. She has changed her ways and will serve good now. And you love her. You will continue to do that no matter what I say.”

“That’s right,” Morgana finally spoke.

“I will be watching, wi-Morgana. Be good to my family.”

“I will,” she replied.

“Good,” Kilgharrah snorted. “Now if there’s nothing else, Young Warlock . . ?”

“No, Kilgharrah, I have nothing else.”

”Then I shall resume my hunting.” He turned to look at the little dragon. “Aithusa?”

“ _Coming_.” He flew up to Merlin, who caught him in his arms. “Bye Merlin!” He nuzzled his head to Merlin’s chest. Then he hopped over to Morgana’s shoulder and rubbed his head against hers. “Bye Morgana.”

Merlin smiled and waved as the dragons took off into the air. Morgana watched with interest. It was interesting to see in real life what she’d only seen in dreams.

Merlin took her hands. “Well that’s over with.”

“It went much better than I thought.”

He chuckled. “I know. I thought he’d be angrier for longer.”

“I’m glad he wasn’t.” Just then she yawned. “Oh my.”

“We should be getting to bed.”

She yawned again. “As much as I’d love to stay here and,” she gave him a quick kiss, “I agree.”

“Only three days and you’ll be here in Camelot for good.”

“Three days.” She smiled and looked into his eyes. “I can’t wait.”

“Neither can I.” He leaned his forehead down to rest on hers. “Goodnight, Morgana.”

“Goodnight, Merlin” She pressed their lips together again, holding on longer this time. He held onto her waist while she opened her mouth with an “mmm.” That deepened the kiss, which they broke when they needed to breathe.

She backed away slowly, keeping her eyes on him the whole time. Then she pronounced the spell to transport away. Soon she was gone and Merlin stood alone in the clearing. He sighed and turned to walk toward Camelot. He didn’t transport back to his room—the last time he’d tried, he’d scared the living daylight out of Gaius and he didn’t need _that_ again.


	8. Chapter 8

Merlin tried but was still late to attend Arthur in the morning. He let the King rant about it for a while and when he finally fell silent, Merlin spoke. “I talked to Morgana.”

“When did you do that?” Arthur wanted to know.

“Last night. That’s why I was late this morning.”

“Oh. So she found you in the woods again.”

“Something like that. But that doesn’t matter. We discussed a plan to get her into Camelot without being seen.”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “I’ve got to hear this.”

Merlin dropped his pretense of folding laundry. “Yeah, you do. Because you’re the one who has to decide what to do with her once she’s here.”

“Of course. So tell me the plan.”

“In three days I’m going to meet her at the Darkling Woods with a pair of horses. She’ll cover her face so she’s not seen and I’ll bring her into the citadel. What happens next is up to you.”

Arthur frowned. “We’ll need a place to put her . . . I don’t think the dungeon will do. Too many people have access to it.”

“Right. What about her old chambers?”

“That would keep her sufficiently isolated. We don’t want to reveal her before her trial—her life would definitely be at risk.”

“Right. I can take care of her until it’s time to reveal her, if you like.” Merlin grinned.

Arthur crossed his arms. “You don’t have an ulterior motives, do you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, if you still fancy her . . .”

Merlin flushed. “That’s none of your business.”

“She’s my sister and you’re just a servant. Of course it’s my business.”

“I have no intention of dishonoring Morgana in any way. You know I wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Speaking of women, have you told Gwen yet?”

“Told me what?” Gwen replied, walking into the room.

Arthur avoided her eyes. That told Merlin all he needed to know. “Arthur has something to share with you . . . about Morgana.”

Gwen’s eyes went wide. “Morgana? What is it? She’s still alive? Has she been seen?”

“In a manner of speaking.” Arthur finally raised his eyes to hers. “She found Merlin in the woods a few days ago and told him that she wanted to come home. That she wants to atone for her crimes.”

Gwen looked over at Merlin. “Are you all right?”

Merlin rolled his eyes. “I’m fine. She didn’t hurt me. Obviously.”

“Did you believe her?” Gwen bit her lip.

“Actually, I did . . . do. I spoke to her again last night, with Arthur’s permission.”

Gwen looked at her husband with a raised brow. “And you didn’t tell me?”

“Honestly, it seemed like a long-shot. But Merlin believes her.”

“This is insane. She could just be waiting to kill all of us.”

Arthur sighed. “Yes, that’s a possibility. That is why I will have her magic bound and she will undergo a trial. She will accept any punishment we find fit for her. Even death.”

“That’s—that’s unusual. When I last saw her she seemed so angry.”

“I know,” Merlin replied. “But, I really do think she’s genuine. We have a plan to bring her here in three days and keep her presence hidden until her trial.”

“I need to sit down,” Gwen stated. She pulled out a chair at the table and all but fell into it. She looked up at Merlin and Arthur. “So you both think this can work?”

“It’s a risk. But if I can have my sister back the way she used to be, even for a while, I’ll take it.”

Gwen shook her head. “She’s hurt so many.”

“And they will all have their say,” Arthur said. “I’ve decided that everyone who feels wronged by her will have a chance to say so at her trial. That means it’ll take a little longer, but she needs to see how she’s affected the people.”

Merlin cut in. “And she’ll gladly listen. She feels the weight of her crimes, believe me. She wants this.”

“And her magic? How do you plan to bind it?”

“Gaius is working on a potion right now to suppress it. He’s making plenty.”

“Then we’re going through with this,” Gwen said.

Merlin walked up and took her hand. “I’m so glad, Gwen. She’ll be so relieved you’ve given her your approval.”

“What else could I do?” She smiled.

Arthur clapped his hands. “All right, Merlin. After you’ve finished your chores in here, you can work on tidying Morgana’s old chambers. That’s where she’ll stay,” he said for Gwen’s benefit.

“Who’s going to look after her?” Gwen asked.

Arthur walked up behind Merlin and clapped him on the back firmly. The servant flinched but kept his smile. “Merlin will.” He smirked.

Gwen’s eyebrow lifted again. “Oh, really?”

Merlin sighed. “I’ve already been through this with Arthur.  Do you have to start too?”

”No. Just be careful, Merlin. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“Don’t worry. I can take care of myself.”

“I hope so.”

Arthur came around the table to hold out a hand to his wife. “Come, Guinevere. Let’s go convince the council in secret that letting Morgana back in Camelot is a good idea.”

Gwen sighed but took his hand and let him pull her up. “See you later, Merlin.” She waved as they left through the door. Merlin just rolled his eyes and went back to folding laundry.

**xxxXxxx**

The next three days passed relatively slow for Morgana. She didn’t have much to pack up besides the scrolls she wanted to take and some old clothes left there before Morgause’s death. She wondered what Morgause would think of her now, going back to the enemy. But she’d learned the hard way that Morgause had manipulated her to her own ends. She should have known that Arthur, Gwen and Merlin would always forgive her. They were her real family.

She put Morgause out of her mind and went down to her little garden to harvest the rest of her vegetables. It was a shame to let it go—maybe she could have a small space in the castle gardens to grow what she liked. The idea made her smile as she walked back into her castle.

**xxxXxxx**

Merlin was kept very busy during his three days. Arthur lightened up on his chores a little so he could take care of Morgana’s old chambers. Uther had sealed them off two years ago, after Morgana had been forced from Camelot for the first time. Everything inside was covered in dust and spider webs. The furniture had been covered in white sheets but all the linens had to be washed and gone through . . . Without magic.

He began by uncovering everything and stripping the bed. He washed all of that and any clothes he found. It wasn’t likely that she’d want everything she had before, so he planned to store most of it and ask her later. She was coming to make a fresh start -- not be reminded of her past.

Arthur became heavily involved with his council, trying to convince them that Morgana’s return would be healthy for all involved. Of course they raised numerous objections ranging from “What if she kills us all?” to “The people will kill her.” Arthur had to use all his diplomatic skills and all three days to get them to agree to his plan. Most of the councilors had lived through her two takeovers so he couldn’t really blame them for the skepticism. However, he knew this was the right thing to do, so he persisted and won.

**xxxXxxx**

When the third morning finally arrived, Merlin awoke before dawn and headed to the stables. There he saddled two horses and led them outside. He tied the reins of one to the saddle of the other and mounted. Soon he was off, riding through the lower town as fast as he could.

It took very little time to ride north to the edge of the Darkling Woods. Once there, he dismounted and led the horses further into the trees where they couldn’t be seen from the outside. No one was around, but he didn’t want to take any chances. The whole plan was risky enough as it was and he just didn’t want to give anyone the chance to spy on them.

After a minute or so of walking into the bush, he looked around for Morgana. He couldn’t see her but that meant very little. He leaned back against a tree and closed his eyes. At the same time, he opened his senses, especially the one that allowed him to detect the presence of magic. For a long while, nothing came to his attention. But soon a sudden flaring of magic alerted him and he opened his eyes to look in the direction he sensed it.

About a hundred yards away, something dark-colored moved in the bushes. He began leading the horses in that direction after a moment, he decided to send a thought to the figure. If it was Morgana, she’d answer back.  If not, he’d conceal himself. “ _Morgana?_ ” He saw the figure turn toward him.

“ _Merlin? Is that you?_ ” he heard in his mind.

Merlin laughed out loud in relief. “ _Yes. Stay where you are. I’ll come to you_.”

He clucked at the horses to get them moving along behind him again. In just a few minutes, Morgana saw them and rushed over. She threw her arms around him and said, “I’m so glad to see you.”

In a moment, his arms were around her too. “And I, you.”

She backed up a bit to look into his eyes, and that was his only warning before she pressed their lips together. He sunk gladly into her renewed embrace and tightened his hold on her. One of her hands slid into his hair and he groaned at the touch, warmth filling his body. She felt like coming home, and that thought was enough for him to break the kiss and look into her eyes. She smiled up at him joyfully as he looked her over, making sure she was all right. When he finished, he took her hand and said, “Come.”

He led them back through the woods to the road. After he untied the second horse from his saddle, he helped Morgana onto it. She drew the hood of her deep blue cloak down over her head so that most of her face was obscured. He squeezed her hand before mounting his own horse.

They rode back to Camelot in silence. There were few people out and about in the lower town and they didn’t pay much attention to the two people on horseback. They rode all the way to the stables without incident and left the horses with the stable boys. Then they left and slipped into the closest castle entrance and started upstairs.

They didn’t encounter many others on their short journey, and those they did barely paid them any attention. This was the busiest time of the day for the castle’s servants.

Morgana was surprised when they stopped in front of the door to her old chambers. Merlin took out a key and opened the door for her then followed her inside. She looked all around the clean space and marveled. “It’s so bare. What happened?” She asked.

“You know that Uther had this room sealed after you left?” She nodded. “No one ever came in here.  When Arthur told me to put you in here, I decided to clean it out.””

“And all my things?”

“I didn’t know whether you wanted those or not. I thought they might bring back bad memories, so I stored them. This way you could have a fresh start.”

“Thank you.” She walked to him and put her arms around him. After a moment, she stepped back. “So what now?”

“Gwen and Arthur said they’d be more comfortable if your magic was bound, so why don’t I do that now? Gaius made a fake potion that she and Arthur think will bind your magic. You’ll drink it in front of them for show, so they won’t know any different.”

“All right. Whatever they want, I’ll do it.”

Merlin smiled and took her hands. “Okay, you ready?” She nodded. “ _Hæfte eallne þæs drycræftes hire sawle!_ ” His eyes flashed gold and she felt like cold water had been dumped over her.

She shivered. “That’s such a creepy feeling. Now what?”

“Now I go fetch Arthur, Gwen, and Gaius for our little demonstration. Just make yourself comfortable.” He smiled and turned for the door.

She surged forward and grabbed his arm. After turning him around, she leaned up to press their lips together. The kiss was short but sweet and the taste of Morgana lingered on his lips.

“Mm,” she said, “now go.”

“Yes ma’am.” He caught her hand, squeezed it and left the room before he could be tempted to stay longer.

After he’d left, Morgana sat on the bed. She finally had time to think— _she was in Camelot_! She finally had the chance to make up for everything wrong she’d done here. The thought made her feel giddy and fearful at the same time.

She lay back on the bed. Whatever happened next, she’d welcome it. She owed these people much and if they took her life, so be it. It was the least she could do since she’d taken so many. She’d miss Merlin and Aithusa but at least she’d have found redemption. And that’s what mattered the most.

**xxxXxxx**

Merlin first went to see Gaius. The old physician knew the plan and had the fake magic-binding potion ready to go in a small bottle. Merlin told him that Morgana was waiting in her chambers but he had to locate the King and Queen first. He told him to wait a few minutes then meet them up at her chambers.

He finally found them in the Council Chambers, speaking with a few of the knights and council members. He walked over to Arthur, nodded and said, “Sire. The package you’ve been expecting has arrived.”

The King turned to his servant, puzzled. “What package? I haven’t been expecting anything.”

Merlin gave him a significant look. “The one you wanted me to fetch.”

Arthur’s eyes went wide as he finally realized. “Oh. That. I see. Well, I’d better go see to it then.” He turned to put a hand on Gwen’s arm. “Guinevere, Merlin’s got that package we’ve been expecting.”

Gwen looked at Merlin in surprise. “Oh! We need to see it, don’t we?”

“That would be good,” Merlin replied. “Come with me, if you would.”

He conducted the King and Queen up through corridors to just outside Morgana’s chambers. Gaius was already waiting there. Merlin unlocked the door and ushered his friends inside, then locked it behind them. They stopped in their tracks at the sight of Morgana on her bed. She sat up and gave them what she hoped was a friendly smile. “Hello,” she said. She stood up and let her arms dangle in an open gesture and waited for someone else to speak.

“You’re really here,” Gwen replied. She took a step closer while Morgana sighed in relief.

“Yes. Gwen, I am so sorry for everything I’ve done, for trying to kill you, for Lancelot—”

“Wait, Lancelot?”

“The man you met was only a shade. And the bracelet he gave you was enchanted to make you love him again.”

“You mean she was enchanted the whole time?” Arthur asked, his fists tightening.

Morgana turned her attention to him. “Yes, Arthur. Your whole falling out was caused by me. And I am so so sorry.” Her head dropped. “I understand if you can’t forgive me for that.”

Footsteps made Morgana look up again. Gwen was now close enough to throw her arms around Morgana and did so. “We’ve put all that behind us. Thank you for admitting this. It must be so hard.”

Tears trickled from Morgana’s eyes. “Not so hard. It was the right thing to do, Gwen.”

Gwen took a step back but left her hands on Morgana’s shoulders. “It may take me some time to forgive you for everything, but I’ll get there. I’m so glad you’re home.” Her eyes filled with tears and she pulled Morgana close again for a minute before stepping back again.

Arthur walked a little closer. “Now that you’re here we can all work on forgiving you.” Gaius and Gwen nodded. Merlin just grinned at Morgana. Arthur turned back to Gaius. “Do you have the potion?”

“Right here, sire.” Gaius held up a little bottle with green liquid. Its contents were harmless but neither of the royals knew that.

“Great. Let’s get this over with.” Arthur gestured to Morgana. Gaius walked over to her, uncorked the bottle and handed it to her. Morgana took it and swallowed the contents down in one gulp. She made a face at the taste but didn’t complain. “Good. Now try some magic.”

“Like what?” Morgana asked.

Arthur frowned. “Anything. But preferably something harmless.”

Morgana held out her hand. “All right. _Leoht_.” Nothing happened.

“What was that supposed to do?” Gwen asked.

“Create a light.”

“Well good, I guess,” Arthur said.

“Right.” Morgana crossed to the table and sat down. The others followed and did the same. “Now what?”

“Now I prepare you for how your trial’s going to work.”

Morgana glanced at her lover. “Merlin explained it to me a little.”

Arthur quirked an eyebrow at his friend, who just shrugged. “Good. We’ll start tomorrow. I’ll make a public proclamation in the morning—you will be there. Then we’ll go to the throne room. You will stand and listen as the people of the kingdom share their grievances about you. You’ll have to take whatever they dish out. And we’ll continue to listen until everyone has had a chance to speak. Then I’ll render judgement.”

“That . . . sounds reasonable. Especially considering what I’ve done.”

“That’s what we thought,” Gwen replied.

“It won’t be easy but you can do it. I know you can,” Merlin said. He reached a hand across the table and patted her arm.

Gwen nodded. “I agree. You’ve always been strong.”

Morgana looked at Arthur. “Do you think this will lead to my execution?”

“I hope not. Because if you’re being totally honest and want to make amends then I really want to get to know you again. As a sister this time.” He smiled.

“I want that, too.”

“Then, just do your best tomorrow and the days that will follow. I can’t promise anything but I will fight for you as long as you are genuine. And I believe you are.”

“Thank you, Arthur, for giving me this chance. You have every reason to turn me away, but the fact that you’re willing to do this for me . . . it means a lot.” Tears flooded Morgana’s eyes again and she stood. Everyone else stood too as Morgana ran around the table to throw her arms around her half-brother.

He hesitated but hugged her back for a moment or so while tears streaked down her face. “I’ll be with you, Morgana, don’t worry.”

“And I,” Merlin and Gwen said at the same time. They laughed and Gwen reached over to catch Morgana’s hand. “Don’t worry. We’ll get through this together, come what may.” She had tears in her eyes again too.

Morgana stepped back from Arthur, who took a moment to straighten out his clothing. “Well, we’ll leave you now to get settled in. You probably want a bath after your journey.”

Merlin and Morgana exchanged glances and she smirked. “Yes, that would be so very nice.”

“Merlin?” Arthur prompted.

Merlin sighed but walked over to the bucket kept in the room. “On my way.” And with a smile at Morgana, he was gone.

Morgana turned to Gaius. “Thank you for helping me, especially after all I did to you.”

“Morgana, just live up to what you said you’d do. That will be thanks enough for me.”

She put her arms around the old man and held him tight for a moment. “I will. I promise I’ll do what I can to make it up to you, to everyone.”

“There’s the Morgana I remember,” Gaius replied while Morgana stepped away from him.

Gwen gave her a quick hug. “Relax and settle in. Try not to worry about anything. Merlin will take care of you.”

“See you tomorrow,” Arthur said as Gwen took his arm. They walked to the door, Gaius following behind. They let themselves out and Morgana heard the locking mechanism slide home.

She went back to sit on the bed and wait for Merlin to return. She smiled as she thought about their relationship. How fast they’d gone from enemies to friends to something more. It felt weird to think of it like that, but that’s what had happened. If she got to live at the end of all this, she’d spend her time making sure he knew how much she valued him.


	9. Chapter 9

Merlin returned with water not long after the other three had left. He made several trips to fill the tub halfway then stopped to murmur, “ _Áfyle eac wӕter_.” The tub filled with water. Morgana looked on, impressed, as he uttered another spell, “ _Onhǽte þá wæter_.”

Steam rose from the heated water and Morgana sighed with appreciation. “Mm, thank you, love,” she told him. She walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

“You’re welcome.” He turned in her arms and matched the gesture. “Is there anything else I can get you right now?”

She gave him a coy look. “Help me with my bath?”

He flushed and backed away a couple of steps. “I-I . . .” She laughed in delight while he stuttered out, “I don’t think I’m ready for that.

“I’m just kidding, Merlin. Though it would be nice.” She winked and leaned up to kiss his cheek.

“Ah,” he sighed. He cupped her face in his hand and brought it up so he could press their lips together. She reached for his waist again and pulled them closer. Warmth radiated through her body and she relaxed into the kiss, enjoying the sensation.

He pulled away after a long moment and looked down into her eyes. “I’ll leave you to your bath and be back in an hour with lunch. Is that enough time?” She nodded and smiled up at him. He pulled her close for another minute then reluctantly let go. “Enjoy.” With a grin he was off again, leaving her to enjoy the warmth of her bath.

Later, after she had bathed and found a simple, but pretty dress in the wardrobe, Merlin knocked on her door and entered. He held enough food for two and they ate together, sharing hopes and expectations for the next day. Later on, he also brought dinner for two and Merlin found himself comforting Morgana’s growing anxiety.

He held her hand. “This really is the best way to make sure your punishment is just,” he explained.

“I know, but I overthrew Camelot twice! That in itself merits execution.”

He chuckled. “And that’s exactly why you don’t get to judge yourself. I want you to live.  So this way is your best option. Face your accusers with the love in your heart. Apologize sincerely and they may see you in a different light.”

“You don’t know everything I’ve done. I’m . . . I was so uncaring, so full of hate and desire to hurt.”

“But that’s not who you are anymore.” He took her other hand. “Even Arthur can see it, and if he can, then you know you’ve really changed.”

She smiled. “You always know how to make me feel better.”

He scoffed. “And you thought magic was my true talent.”

“I’m sure you have many more that I don’t know about.” She winked and laughed at his confusion. “Oh, Merlin, you’re too innocent for your own good.”

“What do you . . . ohh.” He flushed and looked at the floor.

She giggled and lifted his head with her hand. “I love that about you. You give me hope that I can be forgiven.”

“You don’t need me for that. You’ll get there on your own merit.”

Her answering smile was brilliant. “I love you.”

“I know. I love you too.” He leaned down to meld their lips together. He ached with the sweetness of her touch and reveled in her warmth. She could do anything, be anything, but she’d chosen to be here, with him.

When they broke apart, she looked at the window. “Oh my, it’s getting late. And I’m keeping you from your other chores.”

“Don’t worry about it. Arthur’s been pretty understanding of everything I’ve had to do. He won’t mind. Besides, he has Gwen to distract him.”

“That must be fun.”

“Let’s just say I’ve learned to appreciate the fine art of knocking before entering their chambers.” They both burst into laughter at that. Morgana’s tapered off into a yawn. Merlin stood and held out his hand. “Come on—let’s get you to bed. Tomorrow will be a long day and you’ll need your strength.”

Morgana let him pull her up. He pulled a nightgown from the wardrobe and draped it over the changing screen. He turned his back on it while she changed behind it. When she was done, she came out and tapped his shoulder. He turned and took her hand to lead her to the bed. She crawled under the covers he’d turned down and he tucked them back over her. He leaned down to kiss her lips and her forehead.

“I’ll be here with breakfast an hour before Arthur’s proclamation. I’ll be with you the entire time, so please don’t worry. Just relax and sleep. Remember that I love you.” He leaned down and gave her a lingering kiss.

She looked up at him. “With you on my side, how can I worry?”

He brushed the hair back from her face and smiled. “Goodnight, Morgana.”

“Goodnight, love.”

He walked away from her slowly and blew her a kiss at her door. Then he was gone and the door locked behind him. Morgana smiled and rolled to her side. She truly had nothing to fear with him at her side. Soon her eyes slid closed and she settled into a peaceful rest.

**xxxXxxx**

Morgana woke to the sound of Merlin’s voice. He touched her shoulder before kissing her forehead. “Time to wake up, love,” he whispered.

“Mmm,” she replied as she stretched.

“How did you sleep?” He was now sitting on a chair next to her bed, a fond look on his face.

“With my bracelet? Beautifully. I didn’t want to risk seeing the immediate future.”

“Understandable.” He smiled and took her hand. “Though you have nothing to worry about, I’m sure.”

She squeezed his hand. “As long as I have you with me, I have nothing to fear.”

He leaned over to press their lips together sweetly but too briefly for Morgana’s taste. “Here, let me help you up.”

She let him pull her up and lead her to the table where breakfast for two was laid out. They sat and ate, talking about light matters as if nothing important was going to happen later. That, more than anything, relaxed Morgana. And when she finished, Merlin excused himself to wait outside while she dressed. He told her to knock on the door when she was done and he’d take her to meet up with Arthur and Gwen.

While she was dressing, she heard Merlin speaking to different people. She couldn’t hear what was said but could tell the people were curious as to why he was standing in front of the absent witch’s door. _Little did they know_ , she thought. Soon they would though. Very soon.

When she was done, she tapped on the door and it unlocked to reveal Merlin. He held out his arm for support and she took it gladly. The time for anonymity was up and they began walking down the corridor to the royal chambers.

They didn’t encounter many people, but those they did had interesting reactions to seeing her. One Lady turned into their corridor, saw Morgana then turned to walk back the way she’d come. A female servant carrying food dropped her platter, screamed and ran past them as quickly as she could. Morgana rolled her eyes but they kept walking until they reached the royal chambers. Merlin knocked and opened the door when he heard an “enter” from within.

Gwen was helping Arthur fasten his cloak. She looked over to Morgana and asked, “How are you feeling this morning?”

Morgana smiled and pulled Merlin with her over to her friend. “I slept well, so I feel pretty good. Plus Merlin tends to brighten one’s day.”

“He does, doesn’t he?” Gwen replied. Arthur scowled. Gwen whacked his shoulder lightly. “He’s cheerful in the morning and you especially could use that.”

Arthur opened his mouth to reply but changed his mind and closed it again. Merlin beamed. “Thanks Gwen!”

“Is everyone ready for this?” Arthur interrupted.

Merlin and Gwen nodded. “As ready as I’m going to be,” Morgana said steadily.

“Good. Let’s get going then.” As they walked out of the room to the balcony, Arthur turned to Morgana. “I’m sorry about this, but I’m going to have to put you in shackles. To show that you’ve truly submitted to Camelot.”

Morgana felt surprised but didn’t show it. “I . . . understand. I don’t really like it, but if you think it’s best . . .”

“It’s what they’ll expect. I’ll have them removed at the end of the day though.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that.”

Guards awaited them at the entrance to the balcony, they fastened cuffs around Morgana’s ankles and wrists. She sighed but let them. Arthur had a point—she would look more submissive and repentant with them on. As they finished, Gwen came to stand on her left side while Arthur remained on her right. “Ready?” he asked. Both women nodded and the guards in front of them opened the doors leading out into the sun.

Shocked gasps and whispers met the trio. Morgana looked around to find Merlin behind her. She took a deep breath and turned back to face the muttering crowd. Now that they’d caught sight of her, the chatter increased in volume with occasional angry outbursts. Arthur and Gwen exchanged a glance and Arthur nodded.

“People of Camelot. I know how most of you feel about my sister, Morgana. She has returned here to surrender herself to me and to Camelot.” Some of the murmuring died down at this. “I have decided to give her a chance to confess her crimes and pay for them.” People began to protest and several “boos” were heard. “Today I am opening the court to everyone, noble or not, to confront Morgana with the wrongs she has done to you and yours. When everyone has had their say, she will be judged and punished for her crimes.”

The murmuring grew louder again as the people debate among themselves. Gwen shot Arthur a look that said “finish this before it gets ugly.” He nodded and opened his mouth to continue speaking. That’s when a tomato sailed through the air and hit Morgana’s thigh. “What?” Morgana gasped.

Before anyone else could speak, more vegetables came sailing through the air. Guards stepped in front of the King and Queen as Arthur pushed Morgana back at Merlin and said, “Get her out of here.” Another tomato smashed itself at her feet.

Merlin turned Morgana around then moved behind her to protect her from the crowd. “Move,” he told her, giving her a gentle shove. She began shuffling forward to the doors then through. Once inside, Merlin helped her down the corridor back to the royal chambers. He found a cloth, dipped it into the washbasin then began cleaning off her dress. “Are you hurt?”

She moved different parts of her body around. “Just my pride” she replied.

He stood and cupped her face. “Good.” He then started picking bits of food from her hair.

“You’re good at this.”

“I wonder why?” He grinned.

“Intimate knowledge of the stocks, I’d say,” Arthur replied, coming into the room with Gwen. “Any ideas on how to get her into the throne room without using up this year’s harvest?”

“Sure.” Merlin finished his cleaning. “We take her through the servants’ entrance.”

“Of course,” Gwen said. “Though we should probably forestall any more vegetable-throwing.”

Arthur marched back to the door and opened it. “Bring me Sir Leon,” he told the guard outside. The guard nodded and left.

The two couples spent the next few minutes talking about what Arthur had said after Morgana left. He’d rebuked the crowd and told them that as people of Camelot they were surely better than this. Then he told them to line up outside the throne room so they could have their say to her. He and Gwen left after that, shaking their heads in disgust at the ill manners of their people.

Leon stepped through the door just then and Arthur gave him instructions to have the people searched for rotten food and to give them instructions. He hoped no one would take the opportunity to spit on or otherwise abuse Morgana, but he knew that in reality some probably would. Morgana was oddly all right with that. She felt she’d deserved it. Arthur shrugged and finished up with Leon, who then left.

“Are you ready for this?” Arthur asked Morgana.

“No, but it’s what I came here for.” She exchanged a look with Merlin, who nodded and smiled at her. “Let’s go.”

Merlin led them from the room and down corridors Morgana thought she’d never seen before. Eventually they ended up in a narrow passage that came out into the back of the throne room. “You’ll stand down there,” Arthur pointed to the base of the steps, “while we’ll be up here watching. If anyone gets too abusive, the guards will rein them in.”

Morgana nodded. This was why she was here, even though she just wanted to get through it.  She knew every little bit of what she’s go through would be worth it. She’d made them suffer so she would take it in return. Stepping down the stairs, she stood waiting. Merlin stepped down next to her and took her hand. “You can do this,” he whispered and squeezed her hand. She smiled back at him before he walked back to stand behind Arthur.

“Ready?” Arthur asked again. Morgana nodded. “Let them in,” he called down to the guards at the doors. The guards opened the doors and people streamed in.

**xxxXxxx**

The trial lasted three days. Days so long they felt like years and each dragged on for a lifetime of emotions. Morgana hadn’t known there were this many people in the kingdom and it made her physically ill to think of their numbers.

A few really stood out in her mind. A woman whose knight husband was imprisoned, beaten and nearly starved to death. A man whose wife and daughter were killed when Morgana’s crossbowmen shot into the crowd. A woman who had been violated when Helios’s men took the lower town.

But for every prominent memory, there were several more—families whose homes had been pillaged and/or burned down. Merchants whose livelihood had been destroyed. Farmers whose fields had been sacked. Servants who had been abused. Nobles who had lost family members or fortune to one or both of the invading armies. And so many more.

She’d cried with them and laughed with them even as they’d ranted, raved and hurled abuse at her. She’d apologized over and over—some accepted her apologies and forgave her, some didn’t. They expressed their hatred often by spitting but were stopped short of physical violence by the guards.

Now, she sat in her chambers, numb from the emotions of the past three days. She was startled by a knock at the door, even though she’d been expecting Merlin. She stood and walked over to the door to await him. When he opened it, she crossed the last couple of feet to collapse into his arms.

“They’re deliberating now,” he told her. She clung rather tightly to him, more than he expected. He struggled to balance them and ended up leading her to sit on her bed. He put an arm around her and stroked her hair with the other

Suddenly cold, she began trembling. “Will they be long, do you think?”

“It’s hard to say. They _do_ have three days of evidence to go over.”

“So, I shouldn’t expect anything tonight.”

“Probably not.”

“Good.” But tears ran down her face again.

Merlin pulled back a little to look in her eyes. “What is it?”

“How can I sleep tonight, knowing what I know now? Knowing a handful of people are discussing my fate?”

He reached out to take her face in his hands. “Morgana, there’s nothing you can do about that. You have to let it go, love.”

“Will you stay with me tonight?”

“I-I . . .”

“Not like _that_. Just sit with me?”

“I can do that. Did you want some dinner before bed?”

“No, I’m not hungry.”

“All right, then. Let’s get you to bed.” He helped her up and over to the dressing screen so she could change into her nightgown. While she did that, he pulled down the covers so she could get in.

He turned when he heard her footfalls behind him. She crossed the room and flung herself into his arms again. After a minute, she pulled away only to lean up and press their lips together.

I started out gentle but gradually became more urgent on her side. While he loved the warmth that spread through him at her touch, he knew this wasn’t the right moment. She wanted to forget the heavy emotions of the past three days, but that wouldn’t work long-term.

He allowed the kiss to go on for a couple minutes then gently broke away. “Come on now, you need your rest.”

“But I want . . .”

“Believe me, I know what you want. I want it too, eventually. But now’s not a good time for you—you might regret it later.”

“I guess.” She hung her head.

He reached out and lifted her chin with his hand. “Hey. We’ll get there. Just not tonight.” He took her hand and pulled her over to the bed.

She lay down and waited for him to pull the covers over her. Then she watched as he levitated a chair to sit near the head of her bed. As he settled into it, she patted the bed and said, “You don’t need a chair. Come on over here.”

His eyebrow rose and he shook his head. “You don’t give up easily, do you?”

Her eyes glittered up at him. “Never.”

He leaned over and kissed her tenderly. “Good. Now go to sleep.” He took the hand nearest him, kissed it then settled it with his between them.

Her eyes closed and her breathing evened out into sleep. He tried his hardest to stay awake but decided to rest his head on the bed for a little while. Soon he too was asleep and they slumbered together all night, blissfully ignorant of the debating men below them.


	10. Chapter 10

Bed was where Arthur fondly wished he was at the moment. He had a headache from several hours of shouting and he was lonely. Guinevere had just gone to bed but she’d left her firmly-stated opinion behind her—she didn’t want execution. Arthur happened to agree with her but they were definitely in the minority.

The arguing continued as the clock ticked toward midnight. More people were on his side now, wanting to give Morgana a real chance to repent rather than ending her life. He suddenly realized something: he was the King. His vote outweighed all the others. When he smacked his fist down on the table, the council members silenced themselves in shock. “Thank you,” he told them.

“What I hear is most of us agree that giving Morgana a chance to repair her wrongs is preferable to her execution.” There were a few “ayes” from the crowd. “Then I believe a vote is called for.” Across the table, a councilman opened his mouth to argue. Arthur silenced him with a glare. “Good.”

“All those in favor of giving Morgana another chance to repent of her crimes, say ‘aye.’” There was a loud chorus of “ayes” from the crowd. “All those who favor her execution, say ‘nay.’” The chorus of “nays” sounded quieter, but not by much.

Arthur clapped his hands. “The ‘ayes’ have it. Good. Now we’ll discuss the form her punishment shall take.”

That started another discussion, but this one less contentious. Arthur heard several good ideas in the debate and he gradually formed a plan he thought would appease everyone in the room. After he silenced everyone again, he spoke up to outline his plan.

“This is what I propose: that Morgana lives here in Camelot, in the citadel, under watchful eyes. She is to serve the people she wronged, helping them however they see fit—and is reasonable. She will work with them to make up for what she has done. Under close supervision, of course.”

There were nods around the table. A few council members asked him questions, which he answered as the plan crystallized in his mind. The most opposed councilors were gradually coming around to his way of thinking. It only took a few more minutes before he’d satisfied the remaining opposition and everyone more or less agreed with his plan.

He couldn’t wait to tell Guinevere, Merlin and Morgana the good news, but it would have to wait. He had some sleep to catch.

**xxxXxxx**

Merlin woke up to the sound of knocking on the door. “Just a few more minutes, Gaius,” he mumbled. The knocking intensified for a few moments before the sound of a bolt sliding home startled him into awareness. His door didn’t have a bolt . . .

He realized where he was an instant before the door opened and the King of Camelot stepped inside. He simultaneously stood while turning around and said, “This is not what it looks like!”

“And what does it look like, _Mer_ lin?” Gwen walked in behind him and raised an eyebrow.

Morgana sat up in bed. “Honestly, Arthur, he didn’t do anything. I asked him to stay with me and he must have fallen asleep in that chair.” She nodded to the one Merlin had sprung from.

“All right.”

“So you’ll believe her but not me?” Merlin whined.

Arthur just smirked at his friend. “Anyway, I’m here for a different reason.” He looked at Morgana, who’d gotten out of bed. “We decided on a verdict late last night.”

Morgana drooped; Merlin darted forward to steady her, then settled her into the chair.

Gwen came forward and asked, “Are you all right?”

“Just a little surprised.”

Merlin put a hand on her shoulder. Gwen noticed and shot him a quizzical look, which he ignored. She moved to Arthur and took his hand. Arthur looked at her and smiled. “I think you’ll like what I have to say.”

“Tell me then.”

“You won’t be executed.”

Morgana turned to Merlin and grinned brightly.

“I knew it!” he exclaimed.

“ _Mer_ lin.”

“I just had a feeling. And there’s the fact you haven’t executed anyone since you became King.”

“Thank you, Arthur, you have no idea what this means to me,” Morgana said.

“I think I do. That’s part of the reason you’ve been spared. I think you have a strong enough motivation to live, to really make amends for your mistakes.”

“So what’s my punishment then?”

Arthur explained in detail how she’d serve the people of Camelot, working to help those who had suffered. He told her she’d be under close supervision. When she asked who, Arthur smiled. “Merlin.”

Merlin flushed. “Me?”

“Well, you did negotiate hard to get me to accept her again. And aren’t you already watching out for her? It only makes sense that you supervise her. Someone else will set the tasks but you’ll make sure she gets to where she needs to go and comes back here.”

“I totally agree,” Gwen added. “You’re the perfect choice—you’ve already built a friendship. This task will just be an extension of that.”

Morgana smiled up at Merlin. “I think it’s a fabulous idea.” She turned back to Arthur and Gwen.  “Thank you so much for this chance! I will do my best to earn back everyone’s trust. And even if I never win it all back, I will do what I can to help the ones I serve.”

“I know you will. I’m glad you’re back, Morgana,” Arthur replied.

Morgana stood and walked over to Arthur. She threw her arms around him. He hesitated a moment before putting his around her, too. They stood like that for a long moment before Morgana broke away to hug Gwen.

“I’m so glad you’re back,” Gwen whispered.

“Me, too.”

Arthur cleared his throat. “We have to leave now. We are meeting with the council _again_ to discuss which people need your help. Don’t get too excited—this punishment of yours is going to last a good long time.”

Morgana grinned. “I know. Right now, I’m just happy to be alive.”

Arthur nodded. “All right. Come along, Merlin.”

“Me?”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “Yes, Merlin. You’ll need to have an idea of what she’ll be doing day-by-day if you’re to supervise her.”

“Oh. That makes sense.”

“Sometimes I really wonder about you, Merlin.” He turned toward the door. “Let’s go.”

Gwen flashed Merlin a sympathetic smile before she followed her husband. Morgana walked back to Merlin and took his hand. “Don’t worry, Merlin—I’ll be fine. See you later?”

“I hope so.” Merlin turned and left the room, trailing behind the King and Queen.

**xxxXxxx**

Three days later, Morgana started on the work projects that Arthur and the council had decided on. Merlin walked her out every day and accompanied her home. They did take advantage of their time together, holding hands and stealing kisses when no one was looking.

Three months later, Morgana had completed several projects: mending roofs, clothing, tapestries and hearts; repairing market stalls, farm equipment and stonework; planting in home gardens and farms. Her hands were now more callused than they’d ever been but her heart was fuller. She truly enjoyed her time working with the people and getting to know them better. Some even forgave her, but that wasn’t why she worked.

She felt truly grateful for the time she’d spent serving the people. She’d learned so much about the way they lived and what they needed. It was so different from her own life. She shed many tears with them, learning how to forgive herself for what she’d done. At the end of it all, she felt even better about herself than she had as a Lady of the Court or a powerful witch.

Morgana and Merlin naturally became closer. They were sitting in her chambers one day, not long after the council had run out of work for her. She still walked to the lower town daily to see what she could do to help. The topic of their relationship came up.

“Merlin, I’m getting tired of sneaking around. I’d like to make our relationship public,” Morgana said.

A look of surprise crossed his face. “Are you serious?” he replied.

“Of course I am! Merlin, you’ve been there for me since you first came to Camelot and especially since I came to you in the clearing.” She reached over and took his hand. “I can’t imagine loving anyone more than I love you.”

His mouth fell open. “That’s the first time you’ve said that to me.”

“Is it? How remiss of me.” She leaned forward to press their lips together firmly.

Merlin responded immediately. He threaded his hands into her hair to pull her closer. She came with a contented sigh. Her arms slid around his waist as he deepened the kiss, opening her mouth with his. A warm tingle spread through them both, heightening their awareness of each other. Merlin groaned as they broke apart to breathe. “Now, where were we? Oh, yes. I love you, too.”

They came together again, briefly, because Morgana really wanted to press her point. “Then prove it.”

“How am I supposed to do that? Go to Arthur and ask if I can court you?”

“Exactly!”

“I—I . . .”

“You’re not terribly articulate today, are you?”

“Not when you keep throwing surprises at me.”

She took his hands again. “Merlin, I love you and you love me. It’s that simple. Now, go to Arthur and ask his permission to court me so we can formalize our love.” She reached up to lay a hand on the side of his face. “What are you afraid of?”

“His disapproval, for starters.”

“Merlin, I wouldn’t be surprised if he already knew. Gwen’s been watching us with a suspicious eye.”

“Oh, great.”

“No, it is. Look, if they already know about us and haven’t said anything; that means they approve. Let’s go now and make sure.” She stood and tugged at his hand.

Merlin stood. “All right. They should be in their chambers right now anyway.” He let her lead him from the room.

They continued to hold hands as they walked through the corridors. Passing servants and nobles looked at them curiously but said nothing. Once they were in front of the royal chambers, Merlin knocked on the door and they waited.

At Arthur’s call of “Enter,” Merlin pushed open the door. He and Morgana stepped inside.

Arthur sat at his desk with Gwen behind him. Both looked up at their entrance and their eyes went immediately to the other couple’s clasped hands. “So, what can I do for you . . . two?”

Merlin glanced at Morgana, who smiled and nodded. He stepped closer to Arthur. “I—I . . .”

“Are you and Morgana courting?” Arthur asked.

Merlin rolled his shoulders back and took a deep breath. “Yes, we are. And I’d like your permission to formally court her, if I may, sire.”

“Ha! I knew it!” Gwen interrupted. “Now pay up, Arthur.”

Arthur grumbled as he reached into his desk drawer to pull out a gold coin. He passed it to Gwen while Merlin and Morgana watched in shock. He turned back to Merlin to ask, “So tell me—did you ever stop loving her?”

“No. And I tried, but I couldn’t.”

Arthur looked beyond him, to Morgana. “And you love him?”

“With all my heart.”

Arthur turned to look at Gwen, who smiled fondly at him. He turned back to Morgana and asked, “You wish to be tied to him?”

“Yes.”

“All right then.” He focused back on Merlin. “You have my permission to court her.”

Bright smiles spread over Merlin’s and Morgana’s faces. She walked right up to him and threw her arms around him; he reciprocated and leaned down to give her a quick kiss. When it was over, she turned to Arthur and said, “Thank you.”

Arthur smiled and nodded. Gwen watched with satisfaction as they kissed again. Arthur, getting tired of their public display, said, “All right you two. Take it somewhere else.”

Merlin broke away from Morgana. “Gladly,” he replied. And without any further ado, he took her hand and led her out of the room and toward her chambers.

**xxxXxxx**

Epilogue

Six months later, Merlin asked Morgana to marry him. She accepted. A few days before their wedding, she managed to convince him to reveal his magic to Arthur and Gwen. He hesitated, saying he wanted his head attached for the wedding.

“You don’t really think Arthur would kill you?” she prodded.

“Well . . .”

“Come on, Merlin, you’re his best friend, even if he won’t admit it. He won’t kill you.”

“Maybe not. But I do want to survive until our wedding.”

“Don’t you want to go into it with all your secrets out in the open?”

“Morgana, please drop it. I just don’t want to do it now.”

Morgana frowned. “All right. But don’t think I’ll forget this.”

“You wouldn’t be you, if you did.” He leaned over and gave her a quick kiss. “Gotta go attend the prat.” And he was off.

Morgana sighed. She knew for a fact that Arthur wouldn’t kill Merlin for his magic. He’d already accepted her and had made great strides with the Druids. He might be upset that Merlin had lied to him for all this time, but he’d get over it eventually.

As she sat thinking for a few minutes, an idea came to her. It was too late to carry out today, but tomorrow night would be perfect. She’d invite Arthur and Gwen to dinner then . . . oh yes. He wouldn’t be able to refuse. She smirked like she used to and got up to leave. She needed to talk to Gwen to arrange things.

**oo0O0oo**

The next night, Arthur and Gwen arrived at Morgana’s chambers just before dinner did. Morgana and Merlin had decorated her chambers with fresh flowers and a lace tablecloth. Arthur gave everything a look and said, “Wow, you’ve gone all-out. It’s almost as if you want something.”

Morgana smiled. “Not at all. We just want to enjoy a lovely dinner with our friends before wedding craziness sets in.”

They had planned a small wedding in contrast to Arthur and Gwen’s. Very few people were invited, but they included Merlin’s mother, who was on her way. The couple hadn’t wanted a big production since many people still didn’t like Morgana.

As they ate, they discussed typical wedding items—Morgana’s dress, flowers, guests, and the like. When they had all finished the main course, Morgana decided now was the time. “Merlin, don’t you have something you’d like to share with Arthur and Gwen?”

He looked at her in puzzlement. “What do you mean, love?”

“You know weddings are new beginnings. Is there anything you’d like to clear away before we begin our life together?”

Realization dawned on his face. “Oh no, Morgana. Not again.”

Arthur interrupted. “Now I’m curious. What is it you have to share?”

“Yes, Merlin, tell us,” Gwen added.

Merlin sighed. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I guess there’s no time like the present after all. But you won’t like it.”

Arthur stared. “Now I’m getting worried. What could make you so reluctant?”

“Do you promise you won’t hate me?”

“Hate you? Whatever for?”

“Please, just promise.”

“All right. I promise I won’t hate you, _Mer_ lin.”

“Gwen?”

“I trust you, Merlin.”

“I hope that’s still true after this.” He took a deep breath, held out a hand then whispered, “ _Forbӕrne_.” A small fire started in his palm. He glanced at Arthur and Gwen only to see them both staring at his hand, mouths open. “Well, say something.”

Arthur’s eyes darted up to meet his own. “I—I . . .”

“It’s not often you’re rendered speechless, Arthur,” Morgana said.

He glanced over at her before looking back at the small fire. “Well, Merlin, it seems you really did have something to get off your chest.”

“Wait. You aren’t angry?”

“Angry? No. A bit upset you didn’t tell me before this, yes. But I always knew there was something about you . . .”

Merlin turned his eyes to Gwen. “Gwen?”

“I—I’m just so amazed, Merlin! Isn’t it burning you at all?”

“No, look.” He held his hand closer for her to see then rotated his hand under the flame. He had no burns even though the small fire gave off heat.

“Wow.”

“That about sums it up,” Arthur added. “So all those times we miraculously won fights . . . that was you?”

“Yes. I’ve saved your life more times than I can count.” He put out the fire. “So does this mean you’re not going to execute me?”

“ _Mer_ lin. I have already relaxed the law for the Druids and accepted Morgana back to Camelot. Do you really think I could execute you now?”

“No?”

Arthur sighed. “And I thought you knew me better than this. Merlin, if good people I care about have done only good with magic, how can I continue upholding such a law?”

“I’ve only ever used my magic for you and for Camelot.”

“And I believe you. The law must go.”

Merlin grinned. “Thank you so much, Arthur! But what does this mean for Morgana? Is she allowed to have her magic back?”

“You can unbind her magic?”

“Considering I’m the one who bound it in the first place, yeah.”

“You did? I’ll have to give that some thought. How long have you been using magic?”

“Since I was born.”

“I didn’t know that was possible,” Gwen said.

“Looks like there’s no one better for the job then,” Arthur added.

“Job?” Morgana raised an eyebrow.

Arthur nodded. “Yes. It hasn’t been filled in over twenty-five years. Court Sorcerer.”

Merlin’s mouth fell open. “You want me to be your court sorcerer?”

“It means you’ll have to give up your manservant position, but you’ll be an advisor and sit on the council.”

Merlin grinned. “Now you’ll actually have to listen when I tell you what to do.”

“Might as well make it formal.”

Merlin looked over at Morgana and took her hand. “What do you think, love?”

“I think . . . I think you should do it,” Morgana replied

“I do too.”

And three days later, at their wedding, the new Court Sorcerer repeated those words to his bride, making them one. All their friends and family cheered and threw flower petals over them in celebration.

After the ceremony, Morgana somehow wrested a few minutes’ alone time to think. She thought about how her life had changed so drastically from just a year ago. From bitter, vengeful witch to wife, sister and friend. All because a little white dragon saw something in her to save.


End file.
